


Reverberating Echo

by Badgermole



Series: A Failure to Communicate [3]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Aphasia, Backward Talking, Communication, Dissociation, Echolalia, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Panic Attacks, Pathological Lying, Possession, Sign Language, Slow Burn, Song Lyrics, They all have speech issues, selective mutism
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-10
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-06-08 12:14:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 23,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15243168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Badgermole/pseuds/Badgermole
Summary: A late night out with friends leaves everyone drained the next day. Logan and Roman are called out of the Mindscape to help Thomas get some work done, leaving a nonverbal Virgil and a mimicking Patton to hold down the fort... It may not be the relaxing day they had hoped for.





	1. I'm Late, I'm Late, For a Very Important Date

“Thomas requires Roman and me for assistance pertaining to…” Logan paused, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. It was early for everyone after the night of socialization. Introversion at its best. Logan adjusted his glasses back into place once his eyes were as awake as he was. “…pertaining to future videos and professional make believe.”

Virgil gave a small grunt to show he had heard. He was far too tired to figure out how to get his mouth to work properly. Opening one eye slightly, Virgil could see Logan’s back to him intently observing a photo of Thomas with his friends. Logan was hunched over slightly to be at eye level. Last time Logan had checked the picture, it had been from a birthday party. Everyone was wearing those ridiculous pointed conical cardboard head wear… _party hats_. Now it was a capture of Thomas and company from the introduction of one of his videos. Logan had hypothesized that the photos changed based upon the thoughts of Thomas. He still needed to uncover if it was the actual thoughts themselves or if it was done through Patton who was, in essence, a manifestation of thought.

Logan slowly became aware of the sensation that someone was watching him. So Virgil’s day was more of a tired day rather than a bad brain day. That was an important distinction when attempting to interact with him. As observant as Logan is, it took him far too long to realize the fluctuation in his data was because of this unidentified variable. Logan shook his head, he was going to get caught up in his thoughts and miss his meeting with Thomas.

Logan turned to face Virgil who was currently laying on his back his hands interlocked over his chest in a manner that eerily reminded Logan of… _a corpse_. The fact that Virgil’s chest was slowly rising and falling and that they were not actually humans allowed Logan to remove the illogical thought of a corpse from his mind. He adjusted his glasses and stroked his tie. It seemed that he was not as recovered from the previous night as he had thought. This was peculiar, Logan thought. Unless there was an abundance of alcohol, he rarely felt the effects of a night out.

Another quiet grunt came from Virgil. He poked his right thumb into his chest, other fingers straight out. ‘Fine.’

“That is good Virgil. The night was quite long and eventful. I can imagine it was rather a lot for you.” Logan looked down at his watch. Roman of course was running late.

Virgil huffed and sat up leaning on his elbow. He repeated the sign for fine but added a point toward Logan. ‘Are you okay?’

Logan blinked surprised. “My apologies for the misinterpretation. Yes, but it would appear the night was draining for me as well. It is not something I am…accommodated to.”

Virgil made a pinching action with his thumb and first two fingers. ‘No.’ He tapped his lips then made a fist, his thumb pressed to the side of his curled index finger.

“No say ‘a’?” Logan inquired. Virgil shrugged and laid back down, it was the best he had right now. Logan ran through the conversation in his head silently mouthing along. “It is not something I am accustomed to.”

Virgil gave a two finger salute before closing his eyes again, completely returning to his ‘corpse’ position. Logan sighed and moved toward the stairs, hopefully Roman was having a normal day. Had the night out really been this strenuous? He had not detected anything out of the ordinary and Virgil’s normal complaints of being out of the house were more subdued than normal.

He climbed the stairs taking two at a time, Thomas was expecting them and he did not want to be late. Logan passed Patton’s door first which was decorated in glitter, stickers, and some old drawings of Thomas’. He hadn’t seen Patton since returning home last night, or perhaps it was early morning. Time got confusing when there was a lack of sleep and a long night. Patton only kept his door closed while he slept and Patton certainly would not be sleeping now. He was an early riser like Logan, programmed to rise with the sun. Logan needed to grab Roman and get to Thomas but he made a mental note to inform Virgil before leaving. If all of his sides were like this, how was Thomas functioning?

Logan finally reached Roman’s red door knocking three short precise knocks. Roman erupted nearly immediately after the final knock. “Lo! To what do I owe this pleasure?” Roman added with a flourish of his hand. He moved aside to allow Logan to enter his vibrant room.

Through the door Logan could see the red and gold that covered nearly everything. Disney posters decorated the walls almost like wallpaper. Roman had arranged them in reverse chronological order around the room. A little inside joke at himself, one that Logan was secretly proud of understanding without the help of the others. The carpet was a plush gold with red confetti littered in that Roman refused to clean up stating it added to his aesthetic. The bed itself was illogically large. Regardless of how much he moved in his sleep, a normal sized bed would meet the appropriate criteria.

Logan redirected his eyes at the side in front of him, unmoving from his position. “We have a meeting scheduled with Thomas to discuss videos.”

Roman’s smile faltered for a moment. “Ah of course! Let us go and spread my creative genius.” He sunk down with another princely gesture.

Logan sighed and made a quick stop in the living room. Virgil didn’t react to the whoosh of Logan’s arrival. He finally fell asleep, Logan reasoned. He left a scribbled post-it note for Virgil to check on Patton once he woke up.

Before sinking out of the Mindscape, Logan was pleased that at least one of them was functioning at a normal capacity. After doing his work with Thomas, he would have to look into the events of the previous night to discover what set all the sides into such a disarray.


	2. And Everyone Asked About You

Patton blinked his eyes slowly again staring up at unmoving ceiling fan. The noise of the others had long faded away leaving him with comforting silence. He didn’t feel good; as though his body wanted to feel sick yet it wasn’t. Something was wrong and he didn’t know what. A small sad smile crept onto his face. This must be what it’s like for Virgil, Patton thought closing his eyes. It seemed that everyone wasn’t feeling great, at least what he could gather from Logan’s mostly unanswered ramblings throughout the Mindscape.

Oh Logan. Patton’s face saddened again at the thought of the logical side.

Even before Logan’s accident, Patton knew that he was a bit much for the other side to handle. He felt a lot and just wanted to show his love to everyone. He was the dad and had to take care of them. Then Logan got hurt and his powerful words didn’t hold the same strength they once did. Sometimes he couldn’t access his large precise vocabulary and the only real way he could express himself without diving into the dark unexplored depths of emotion was gone.

Logan hated being wrong. He hated not knowing. When he stumbled for a word and replaced it in a vain attempt to get his point across, Patton would pick up on it. Rather than give the caring words of support he wanted, out of Patton’s mouth would tumble the stupid incorrect word rehashing the wound of Logan’s imprecision. They both knew it wasn’t something Patton could control, but Patton could see each time Logan’s face twitched or his shoulders tensed.

It was really hard in the beginning, Patton recalled while subconsciously fiddling with the ace bandage around his hand. Logan had locked himself away, refusing to talk to anyone. The first week he wouldn’t even answer Thomas’ summons. They never really found out what went on during his isolation, but they knew for sure Logan never stopped working. Finished papers and files were found in front of his dark galaxy door addressed to the other sides or Thomas. Patton had wanted to help, be the shoulder to cry on, but the loss of Logan from their family left him too stressed for his own caring and supportive words to form.

Eventually, Virgil had been the one to get Logan to open the door. Well actually Virgil broke the door down, busting the side of the door frame. The two had sat together in silence, according to Virgil, with the door closed as much as it possibly could be. Patton had paced the hallway the entire time. He couldn’t help the way he wanted to or the way he needed to.

//////////////////////////////////

A chill ran down Virgil’s spine, pulling him from his nap. He hadn’t even realized he had fallen asleep. Oh god, he hoped he hadn’t fallen asleep while Logan was still talking with him. He sat up running his hands over the hoodie, the texture calming him before remembering something had startled him awake. He did a quick visual sweep of the living room and the bits of hallway he could make out from the couch. Nothing. He was alone.

After one more look around, he swung his legs letting his feet land silently on the old rug below. Raising his arms far above his head, Virgil felt his back bend and crack ever so slightly. He let out a puff of air. He grabbed the bright yellow post-it note from the coffee table and read it over a few times. Poor Pat.

Virgil rose from his seat and padded across the room and up the stairs toward Patton’s room. The nap had recharged him but he still felt like a bag of rocks. Perhaps Thomas had fallen ill, the flu was always going around and he had just been surrounded by a large amount of people. There were only so many germs he could be exposed to constantly in his home bubble. He couldn’t possibly have an immunity to everything under the sun. Unknown environment with unknown people could definitely get him sick. Logan would be sure to get Thomas the right medicine while they were together though. There was nothing to worry about. All Virgil had to do was check up on Patton and they would be feeling better in no time. Yeah, Virgil could be optimistic sometimes.

Patton’s baby blue door was still closed when Virgil arrived. What if Patton was trying to sleep it off? He would feel horrible if he woke Patton from his much needed slumber. Sleep could be just as powerful as any medication sometimes. But what if Patton was worse than him? Overheating from a fever could lead to dehydration which could lead to Patton passing out on the floor with no one to find him for who knows how long! Patton felt more strongly than the others so this bug was probably having a field day with him. Virgil rubbed the back of his neck with more pressure than he meant. Perhaps he should have gotten a cup of cold water or some Advil or something from the bathroom before he opened the door. He was in charge of making sure Patton was alright. If Patton was sick, how could he promise to take care of him but then arrive with absolutely nothing to do so!

The small part of his brain that currently wasn’t spiraling lightly rapped his knuckles across the solid block of wood before turning the doorknob. Virgil couldn’t decide if he was excited or terrified that the door was unlocked.

The room was far too dark. Patton’s room was not dark. It couldn’t be dark. Patton was too bright for darkness. Virgil’s room was dark. Virgil was dark.

Virgil cleared his throat trying to figure out both what he should say and what he could actually say. In the silence left by his attempt at organized thoughts, Virgil heard Patton echo the throat clearing.

Well, this is just great.


	3. This One Goes Out to My Closest Friends, the Ones Who Make Me Feel Less Alien

Patton didn’t know when he had started crying, but his face was wet when he heard Virgil clear his throat. Virgil had probably been worried about him. Patton had made his dark strange son worried about him. Again. He went to apologize but all that came out was a throat clear. Of course it was going to be one of those days.

A weight at the foot of his bed dipped the old mattress causing some stuffed animal friends to roll into Virgil. Patton propped himself up onto his elbows and dropped the hood of his cat onesie to get a better view of Virgil. The room’s light was still off but soft hallway light bleed through the open door. The younger side was pulling at the threads of the cuffs of his old black hoodie. As much as Patton loved the splash of color of the purple stitched jacket, sometimes Virgil just needed the extra comfort from the older hoodie. One of these days, the whole thing was just going to burst into a pile of threads from all the tugging.  

“Ground control to Major Tom.” Patton sing-song whispered.

Virgil flinched at the sudden noise, but was slow to raise his head trying to play it cool. The one corner of his mouth twitched upward before his face relaxed looking at Patton. Virgil motioned to himself signing an M and a T. Then motioned to Patton signing a G and a C. Patton beamed a smile that Virgil was sure lit up the dark room.

“Hello, is it me you’re looking for?” Patton asked scooting over next to Virgil and swung his legs down. The fluffiest carpet one could think up cushioned his toes and tickled his feet.

Virgil picked up the Pound Puppy that had rolled into him and gently handed it to Patton. He raised his hand as though to say something before dropping it to his lap taking a deep breath. The air expanded his chest, swirling in his lungs before being released out of his nose. He repeated a few times staring at his socked feet.

Taking the hint that Virgil wasn’t going to say anymore, Patton leapt to his feet and held his hand out for Virgil to take. “To infinity and beyond.”

Patton pulled Virgil up. The room always made Virgil uncomfortable and he was already in the hall waiting for Patton to follow. Patton started toward the door, a smile on his face as he was trying not to burst into giggles from the constant tickles he was getting to his feet. Now that both of them were in the light of the hall, Patton realized he had forgotten his glasses on his night stand. If he had left them that meant that he hadn’t gone through his normal morning routine. He gently hit his forehead with his palm. Dumbo! He woke up feeling sick and had only the motivation to get his cat onesie on over his pajamas. Just skipped the entire process of getting up!

Virgil was waiting for him to start walking. Patton had found out that Virge would walk half a step behind whoever he was with. He wasn’t a leader, not that Patton minded. Patton got overexcited a lot which lead to him flailing around while he spoke. No one wanted to get caught in that cross-fire, Patton chuckled quietly.

“I can see clearly now the rain is gone.” Patton motioned to his glassless eyes then added, “7 AM, the usual morning lineup.”

Virgil seemed to get it, he always did, and started back downstairs. He would probably whip something up in the kitchen. It had to be the afternoon by now so Patton-cakes were probably not on the menu, unfortunately. Virgil was very strict about the time that breakfast foods could be made in the kitchen. Although he had a lot of culinary skill, he seemed to struggle a lot with breakfast and did not want to be reminded of it. Regardless of the shortcomings Virgil thought he had in that area, Patton thought he did wonderfully. Never once had Virgil caught the kitchen on fire trying to make breakfast!

Patton turned back inside his room, locking the door behind him. He was so happy that Virgil was slowly letting the sides into the kitchen. He knew it was hard. Virgil’s room was such a dark and scary space sometimes. Who could forget the creepy crawly death dealers? But the kitchen was a space out in the open that Virgil felt comfortable.

Before the others had properly accepted Virgil, he would sneak into the kitchen at odd times throughout the night when everyone was sleep. He would cook up food for the others and put it into the fridge for them to find. Even when Virgil was having a bad day, his anxiety higher than normal, he would be working away in the kitchen making sure the other sides had food prepared.

Patton was so proud of his shadowling recently. Virgil had been freaking out about the outing from last night. He had approached Logan to help him in the kitchen, not trusting his hands to safety cut or accurately measure the ingredients. Logan of course helped out, following all the instructions from Virgil to a T. The meal was delicious.

Placing his hands on his hips, Patton looked over the room one last time. It may have looked like a mess to anyone else but he knew that everything had a proper place. He caught a glance of himself in the mirror. Although he had put on his normal attire of polo and pants, with Logan out he placed the onesie over his shoulders and tied the paws together. It was heavier than his normal wear and he was in such a cuddly mood today.

Patton nodded in approval at his reflection. “Hey now, you’re an all-star.” Patton complimented himself before heading out into the hall and down toward the kitchen.

“Hello from the other side!” Patton announced before jumping through the threshold into the kitchen. Although Virgil flinched at the sudden proclamation, a smile flashed across his face as the dad joke registered. It showed just how clever Patton actually was, being able to pull off jokes like that with the limited communication he had sometimes. Folks didn’t give him enough credit.

Virgil cracked his knuckles, getting a small grimace from Patton, before motioning to the plate beside the stove. Virgil went back to washing the bowl in his hands so Patton investigated what creation was ready to be devoured.

The kitchen was quiet except for the sloshing of water in the full sink and the scrub of sponge on metal. Before Virgil had time to process what was happening, Patton had let out an incomprehensible garbled stream of excited sounds and was tightly wrapped around Virgil. Virgil released his white knuckled grip on the bowl and twisted around to get a look at Patton. Everyone was having a horrible day, so why not make the one thing Patton loved most? Patton had an enormous smile that made Virgil blush. There was a feeling of uncomfortableness within Virgil’s chest but it was the good kind if there was such a thing.

The others had figured out it was really tough for Patton when he was echoing. He would immediately repeat from what he just heard before he had a chance to even properly say something from his archive of quotes. Logan had once described it as Patton wanting to insert into the conversation and taking the path of least resistance. It pulled from the words it had just heard.

That’s why, in part, when he wasn’t having a good day Patton enjoyed spending time with Virgil.

Virgil was always just a quiet guy in general, and when Patton would automatically repeat whatever was said around him it was relaxing to hang around someone that wasn’t going to say anything. Even though they still were not his words, they were as close to real as Patton could gather. Patton was able to have his voice when his brain wouldn’t let him. And he was forever grateful for Virgil.  

Patton squeezed Virgil once more then released him from the hug. He grabbed the plate of Patton-cakes and sat down at the table in the next room. So the day wasn’t as bad as he had thought.


	4. Cheep, Cheep, Cheep, Cheep, Cheep

The day was worse than he had anticipated.

“Thomas, do you have any...” Logan clinched his teeth together. “...weed?”

Thomas choked on his water while Roman let out a dramatic gasp. “Whaaat!?” Roman screeched holding his hand to his chest as though the shock had led to heart palpitations.

“You alright there, Specs?” Thomas asked after taking a few deep breaths. His brow was knitted together, concern and confusion written across his face.

Logan ground his teeth together. He knew it wasn’t the right word but it was as close as he could find at the moment. Logan narrowed his eyes at Roman. He knew he shouldn’t have asked without knowing the proper word. His health was important, not just for his own well-being but also for Thomas. Therefore he had asked.

“That was not the correct word.” Logan grumpily clarified crossing his arms. He turned toward Thomas. “I believe I am suffering the early symptoms of a migraine. I would like some…to help remedy this.”

Logan waved his hand as though that would mask his inadequacy. Roman snickered, which gained a glare from Thomas.

“Oh, you want some medicine? Is Advil alright?” Logan nodded in affirmation as Thomas disappeared into his bathroom to get the medicine.

 _Advil, Advil, Advil_. Logan repeated in his mind imaging the blue gelled cylinder in his mind’s eye. He knew it wouldn’t help, but placebos could be very powerful sometimes. So in an attempt not to look like a fool again, Logan would always repeat his forgotten word over and over again in a fruitless attempt to make them stick.

“How did you end up at weed Lo?” Roman inquired. It was rare any of them could follow the leaps that Logan’s brain went to find at least an adjacent word. But they all put in the effort to try at least to figure it out so they were more prepared the next time it happens.

“Both weed and Advil are…“ Logan‘s face scrunched in thought. Once again another word slipping from his mind. He adjusted his glasses and stroked his tie. It truly was a horrendous day.

There was an awkward silence as a Roman gave Logan a chance to figure out the word he wanted. Sometimes it was best to just let Logan figure it out on his own. The gears were turning behind Logan‘s eyes. How could he forget already? Thomas had just said it! Roman started getting worried that smoke was going to start billowing out of Logan’s ears, so he offered to change the topic. They both knew what he was trying to say anyway.

“You know, we should do a video about the stars!” Roman waved in an arch above his head. “We always have the same setting. There is absolutely no creativity here. It is stifling! We need to take the video outside and see all the stars.”

“Well concerning the light pollution in the neighborhood it would not be feasible to film near the house. There are the possible filming locations of the local parks and forests that Thomas has utilized during the short videos as well as vines. Most parks close at sunset so entering there would be trespassing and we cannot have Thomas getting arrested.” Logan rambled. “It is commonly understood that traveling through an unknown landscape in the dark is unsafe. There is the most probable danger of disrupting the wildlife which could lead to harm or there is, alternatively, the very improbable storyline of many classic horror films.”

“There is that field,” Roman dropped in the small gap of silence while Logan took a second to breathe.

“The field does allow an unobscured view of the night sky. The space is open which can allow easy navigation with equipment and the ability to safety monitor the surrounding area. As Thomas has used this space before…”

Thomas walked in with Logan going on in his own little world. He shot Roman a thumbs up before putting the bottle of Advil and a cup of water on the table. It had been a while since Logan had gotten so wrapped up in something. Thomas had missed it tremendously. If Roman was being honest too, he missed the puppy excitement from Logan.

‘He’s only paused to take a breath.’ Roman mouthed not daring to break Logan’s concentration. Roman couldn’t remember the last time Logan had gotten long winded without the frustrated pauses that littered his sentences these days.

Logan came to a sputtering stop mid-sentence. The others couldn’t tell if it was because he lost the words or if he was aware that they had been staring letting him ramble to his heart’s delight.

“I got the pills you wanted.” Thomas broke the silence and motioned to the objects on the table.

Logan simply nodded and rubbed his temples while passing in front of Thomas. He plopped down into the seat at the table as though he was beyond exhausted. A worried look passed between Thomas and Roman.

“Been a while since you’ve done that,” Roman gave a forced chuckle, “You have to build back up your stamina there Lo.”

Logan gave a faint nod before downing the two capsules dry. Silence dragged on, filling the room with a horrible tension that was making Roman antsy. Logan was not the strong silent type, that label definitely fell to Virgil.  To break the tension, Roman was tempted to make a remark that he had never heard the logical side so quiet for so long but didn’t trust his own voice right now. Thomas cleared his throat, about to ask Logan what was going on but Logan flinched at the noise and held up his hand to stop. So the three of them sat not making a noise, Roman and Thomas staring at Logan while the latter looked intently at the lines on his palms. Logan’s faces was once again scrunched up in confusion, the gears turning rapidly in his head.

Occasionally, Thomas caught Roman’s eyes and mouthed ‘What in the world is going on?’ Roman replied with only a shrug. He had no more information than Thomas did. And he wagered that Logan, despite all his intelligence, had barely any more than the others.

No one was entirely sure how long they stayed like that, but Logan slowly raised his head staring down Roman. The intensity of Logan’s eyes boring into his soul made Roman shift uncomfortably. He wanted to get up and leave, but he stayed watching Logan with softer eyes. Logan placed his hand flat in front of him as one would to show the height of someone and slowly lowered it as though this imaginary person was shrinking. Roman raised his eyebrows slightly as Logan repeated the motion for him. Roman stood straight, flourished his arms into his princely pose.

But nothing happened.

Roman bounced slightly, bending his knees.

“Uh Ro?” Thomas whispered completely confused.

Roman continued his odd bouncing, getting ready to start pounding on the floor. His hair was flopping around, while the sash was making its way off his shoulder. His face was slowly darkening into in deep red from a mix of frustration and exertion. 

“It seems we cannot get back into the…the…home.” Logan stated in a stern whisper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any ideas for the speech issues for Deceit or Remy if they decide to make an appearance? 
> 
> Also, I added chapter titles. They're all quotes- song lyrics, books, movies, etc.


	5. I Felt a Great Disturbance in the Force

A small chill ran down Patton’s back as he scarfed down his entire plate of Patton-cakes before Virgil had even finished a single one. Virgil didn’t even have time to tell him to slow down. Patton gave a sheepish smile at seeing Virgil’s shocked face and barely touched stack of pancakes. Shaking his head with joking disproval, Virgil put his thumb against his forehead, slightly offset above his eye, with his fingers upright. ‘Patton.’ It was actually the sign for father but Virgil thought it would be a good name sign for him. He was the father figure anyway. When Virgil had explained what it meant, Patton had tackled him into the couch in a big bear hug. Although Virgil was surprised and was redder than anyone thought possible, he awkwardly returned the hug. Now, even when his voice was working, he would sometimes discreetly sign it to the father figure to brighten up the surrogate dad’s day.

“A lot of customers like the soup, that’s all we are saying.” Patton shrugged whipping the rest of the syrup and whipped cream mixture from his plate. From the corner of his eye, he could see Virgil still shaking his head. “I will make this easier to remember: keep your station clean…or I will kill you!”

Virgil jumped a bit at the loudness of the killing portion of the quote, but took it in stride. He made a light motion that hopefully said, ‘Geez Patton, no need for that.’ He smiled and stabbed a few of his pancakes. Raising his fork, Virgil motioned for Patton’s plate.

“Nah nah, Honey I’m good. I could have another but I probably shouldn’t.” Patton shook his head and moved slightly to shield the empty plate. Virgil would steal it if he had the chance and plop the food on it. And as everyone knew, you couldn’t give back the gift of food! He rubbed his full stomach for emphasis.

Virgil raised an eyebrow but returned the pancakes to his own plate. Virgil was a slow eater and didn’t like it when people watched him eat so Patton tried his best to occupy himself while he waited. On any other day, Patton would fill the void with his rambling of cute animals Thomas had seen while he was out of the house or all the achievements the various sides had completed recently. Today he couldn’t gush about his lovely children or cute animals. Patton absently played with the paws of the cat onesie around his shoulders. He didn’t think he had memorized any good stories but the silence was getting to him a bit.

“Early in the morning,” Patton paused, watching Virgil flick his eyes up to show he was listening before continuing. “in the middle of the night, two dead boys got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other. Drew their knives and shot each other. An old deaf cop heard the noise, and rescued the two dead boys.”

Virgil tilted his head in confusion. “Where?” He squeaked out.

“Where?” Patton shrugged and traced the design printed on the plate.

“Early in the morning, in the middle of the night,” Patton began again still looking down at his plate. “two dead boys got up to fight.”

Virgil let Patton finish the story once more before grunting. Patton repeated the grunt but looked up at Virgil’s questioning and concerned eyes. Virgil’s hand formed a thumbs up. He slowly traced a path from the middle of his neck up the underside of his chin. Once that was finished, he pointed at Patton. ‘Not you.’

Patton gave a small smile. It wasn’t something he had ever quoted before. He wasn’t entirely sure where he had gotten it from. The story was old and bizarre though, a bit like Patton himself. Patton opened his mouth about to start again.

“Who?” Virgil tried. Sometimes Patton got stuck in those loops for a while and it was best to stop it before it started getting too bad.

“Who?” Patton once again shrugged his shoulders. He didn’t know. It was a strange story, more suited toward Virgil’s tastes than his own. Perhaps it was Logan? He read aloud from old books all the time.

“Early in the morning.” Patton had no idea what he was trying to say anymore, but there was something about the story that he needed to say. He desperately needed to say something that there was no quote for.

Virgil’s face flashed quickly between pity, anger, and exhaustion. “No.”

“No.”

Virgil scratched the back of his neck. He always prided himself on his skill of being able to communicate with Patton but he was completely drawing a blank right now. He could tell Patton was gearing up for another go around. Virgil gave a sad smile. He guessed he would just let it run its course.

////////////////////////////

As Logan’s migraine started subsiding through the help of the drugs, he looked up at Roman who was fruitlessly jumping around like complete buffoon. Nothing out of the normal there. It was no use honestly. It was not a spatial problem of Thomas’ home. It instead was a problem within Thomas’ mind.

“Please don’t break my floor,” Thomas cringed as Roman posed ready to leap yet again from the couch. Roman jumped down anyway with the same result as last time…and the last fifty times.

“He is experiencing a heightened sense of…Virgil.” Thomas whispered ‘anxiety.’ “Letting him tire himself out may be beneficial in reducing his anxiety. This in turn can clear his brain allowing more brain function to be put toward his…Roman… in helping to uncover what is going on here.”

“Creativity,” Thomas offered. Roman paused at the sound of his name and trait. The fiery passion in his eyes dimmed as he scanned the tired faces of his host and fellow side. Roman could see the pain leaking through Logan’s mask of a blank face. His tie was hanging loosely around his neck. Thomas’ hair was a mess from constantly running his fingers through it. He himself probably looked a mess with all the unhelpful flailing around he was going.

“Do you think Pat and Virge are okay?” Roman whispered. He sat down on the couch and slid the sash back up his arm. His hands found their way up to his hair in an attempt to restyle it. Without a mirror or product no less.

“I can, uh, still feel them?” Thomas shrugged. There was no protocol for this, whatever this was. “And I feel fine. Aside from, you know, the stress that you guys can’t get back.”

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose. The noise from the others was like sandpaper but he had to push through it. “Neither was having a particularly pleasant….time when we left.” He waived his hand absently. He hadn’t had this much trouble since the accident. “…Anxiety was experiencing a nonverbal period. Patton had yet to emerge from his room for the….morning.”

Logan looked up suddenly as the puzzle pieces fell into place. Against the protests of his throbbing head, he rose to his feet with posture as perfect as ever.

“Logan-“ Thomas began with questioning eyes. Logan raised his hand for Thomas to stop. Something had in fact been bothering him all day. He had simply attributed it to the migraine, but now he was sure it was not. It was something much worse.

He adjusted his glasses slowly, letting the uncomfortable silence fester between the three of them. “Roman,” Logan gave a stern point at the prince. “You have not spoken backwards once since we have been together today.”

Roman opened his mouth. He didn’t know where Logan was going with this but he surly felt attacked right now. Logan narrowed his eyes as though probing the dark depths of the other’s soul. The discomfort shut him up.

“Patton, Virgil, and I have been feeling absolutely atrocious following the outing last night. From that list, one can see that a side is missing. The absent quantity would be you, if you were unaware.” Logan’s words flowed through him the best they had since the accident. “Backwards speak is not something that can be easily mimicked. Although it is an ability one could learn, there is a difference between your native backward speech and those that emulate it.”

Roman shifted again under the accusing gaze. He rose to his feet not able to stand being talked down to. He was a prince and a prince was not to be treated as a criminal. “Lo, geez. You really need to rest that head of yours.”

“Talk backward.”

Roman gasped and moved his hand over his heart. “It’s not something I can control! You know that. I can control it as much as you can yours or any of the others can control theirs.”

A small smile of victory flickered over Logan’s face for a second. Blink and you would have missed it. “Your logic is flawed. There is a small set of words which you will always say in reverse.” He crossed his arms pleased with his deduction skills. “Say the name, the full name, of any of us.”

Roman could feel the sweat dripping down the back of his neck. “This is absurd Lo. I-“ Roman began only to be cut off once again by Logan.

“You cannot, because you are not Roman.” Logan narrowed his eyes. “Deceit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a jerk to write. I hope it turned out okay.


	6. They’re the Faces of a Stranger, but We’d Love to Try Them On

Roman was sputtering incoherently in shock at the accusation. Thomas had sat down, his legs suddenly jelly. His eyes flirted between the stoic Logan and reeling Roman.  The uncomfortable silence had since been replaced with tension and uncertainty.

“That’s, uh, that’s a rather serious accusation there Logan.” Thomas tentatively adding after finding his voice.

“It is a perfectly logical explanation of the variables.” Logan adjusted his glasses and stroked his tie. “Roman’s backward speech will occur on average once every two sentence with a variance based upon his mood. Although the mood may be favorable and thus leading to a lessening frequency of backward speech, there is no data so support the statement that it will completely disappear for such a long period of time.”

Whatever was short-circuiting in Roman seemed to have fixed itself as he retorted, “What about you Poindexter? Your thing is easy to fake! You’ve been speaking fine too!”

Logan paused for only a second, taken aback by ‘Roman’s’ reasoning. “I will have you know, due to the nature of my speech disorder it is possible for some speech recovery through time and speech therapy. I have been spending time researching and improving my speech.”

Despite Logan’s monotone voice, there was a fire in his eyes. All the sides suffered bouts of self-consciousness about the way they spoke. Logan most of all. His condition was not something that had been with him most of his existence unlike the others. Roman may have gotten his after his existence began as well, but his strength was in his sword not his words.

“Well…” Roman racked his brain for a counter argument. As everyone knew, you never get involved a land war in Asia, and you never get involved in a debate with the logical side. “You forgot Virge’s name! Never ever, this whole time, have you ever forgotten our names!”

Logan’s entire demeanor changed at that. He dropped back into his chair with an ungrateful and uncalculated thud. Had he really forgotten Virgil’s name earlier? Ignoring the fact that they were fractions of the same person, he had always considered Virgil and himself close. Friends, or possibly even brothers perhaps. There were rules to these things, or at least Logan had assigned rules to them…

            Roman always spoke their names backward.

            Patton would repeat things he immediately heard before he provided his ‘own’ words.

            Virgil couldn’t handle any type of communication directed at him on bad days.

            Logan always remembered their names.

Internally Logan was crumbling. There were rules that had to be followed! Each time the logical side replayed the conversation in his mind, he hear where he stumbled for Virgil’s name and replaced it with Anxiety. He wasn’t Anxiety anymore he was Virgil. There was a difference, a very important difference. Anxiety was the outcast, the villain, the dark and brooding ‘Debbie downer,’ and ‘Dark Side.’ Virgil was his friend, a comrade against the ‘extra’ moral and creative sides, a part of the self-proclaimed ‘Light Sides.’

Emotion started clouding his logical brain. The rules were just made up. They didn’t mean anything. There was no use trying to have any semblance of understanding it. How soon until he couldn’t remember Virgil as a person? How soon until the faces around him became strangers? How soon…

Roman was oblivious to the war within Logan, and toke the silence as an admission of defeat. He starting doing a happy dance humming a generic victorious theme. Thomas who had been silent the entire time, unsure as how to intervene, whacked Roman on the arm. He mouthed ‘Stop it’ and pointed to the clearly distressed Logan.

“Hey Lo, you alright?” Thomas quietly took a step closer to Logan. Did he need personal space or the pressure of a giant bear hug? He had some experience with the others breaking down, whether it was an anxiety attack from Virgil, the release of bottled emotions from Patton, or a horrible bruising to Roman’s ego. The only time Thomas could really remember such a broken Logan was after the accident, and even then no one saw him. No one had been there to help him. They hadn’t tried hard enough to help him. Thomas was not going to make that same mistake again.

“Yeah Lo,” Logan flinched away from the sound of Roman’s voice. He cleared his throat before beginning again trying to calm his naturally rambunctious tone. “Lo, I…uh…I didn’t mean what I said? You know me, getting wrapped up in the moment and all. How could I think you weren’t you, you know?”

Logan kept his head trained down at his shoes while he stood up. He adjusted his glasses which had become askew after his collapse in to the chair. His left hand formed a fist and Roman took a step back, knocking his calves into the couch nearly causing him to fall back. Rather than strike Roman, Logan rose the fist to his own chest and made a small circular motion. ‘Sorry.’ Logan then ran his thumb from his neck up the underside of his chin and pointed at Roman.

“You still think I’m not me?” Roman inquired utterly confused.

“It’s not just a point. It’s a D pointing at you,” Thomas said nodding his head as he put the broken sign language together. “Sorry, you are not Deceit.”

Logan had started moving while the others were talking and now had his hand on a doorknob.

“Where are you trying to go Logan?” Thomas asked as the closet door opened, a few coats and shoes tumbling out. He made a small mental note that he had to clean it out at some point.

Logan didn’t reply, only staring confused at the objects down at his shoes. That is not right, Logan thought and tilted his head slightly as though the change in perspective would give some insight into the unexpected clothing.

“You want somewhere to clear your head? Like the bathroom?”

Logan made a small correction to his head through a slight rotation toward Thomas. The bathroom should not have shoes and coats. That was entirely illogical. He would never have let Thomas rearrange his storage in such a way if he had known about it. They would have to discuss it later when the world had calmed down.

“I’ll, uh, get you there…” Thomas rubbed the back of his neck unsure if that was what Logan wanted or not. After making sure Logan was okay with being touched, he grabbed his arm and started toward the bathroom. He didn’t want Logan wandering out of the house or getting lost in the state that he was in.

Once Roman was sure he was alone and the others could not hear him, he whispered into the vacant room, “Logan.” A shiver ran down his back. That was not good. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many many thanks for the 50+ kudos! You folks are awesome.


	7. F is for Friends who Do Stuff Together, U is for You and Me

The bubbles that filled the space around Patton’s hands were slowly disappearing. He could see the silver metallic bottom of the sink through the soapy water. Brunch had finished long ago. The odd story of the two dead boys had slowly faded away. Unfortunately, neither Patton nor Virgil had had the chance to figure out what exactly the former had wanted to convey. The following silence was appreciated by both though. It could be exhausting having your voice go on and on as though it had a mind of its own. Even worse, Patton should see that Virgil’s tolerance to the noise and socialization was rapidly falling.

When Virgil had hastily finished, Patton had attempted to apologize but Virgil gave a short understanding smile before motioning to the stairs. He needed time alone, he hadn’t fully recovered from the previous night’s adventure out of the house. Patton watched as the younger side disappeared upstairs before being left alone with his thoughts. Patton hated making the others feel bad. He was the heart and the dad after all!

The telltale squeak of Virgil’s door had echoed through the empty Mindscape. Patton always found the squeaking door funny. Virgil could be as quiet as a mouse or an amazing ninja. He was even quiet in the way he spoke. His loud music could barely be heard most of the time. But he had the squeakiest door Patton had ever heard.

But now the only sound was the quiet popping of soap bubbles and sloshing water. Patton returned from his memory and continued cleaning the dishes. It was one of the few things he was trusted to do alone in the kitchen. Virgil had been sweet enough to cook breakfast outside of the allotted breakfast time, so cleaning up the mess had been the least Patton could do. Not that there was much of a mess. Virge was always paranoid about things catching fire or knocking and shattering anything onto the floor. He kept his workspace clean and strategically used the least amount of cooking supplies he could.

Patton poured more soap into the sink, more so for his enjoyment of the bubbles than actual cleaning purposes. Who didn’t love bubbles? It was one of those things you could not be mad at. He started humming a Disney song he couldn’t quite remember the lyrics to. As the song morphed into another, Patton let himself relax taking in the calm atmosphere. Everyone was okay and happy. He would have to convince Virgil to have another family dinner extravaganza again. It was so fun for everyone to be in the kitchen together covered in flour and the sweet smell of warm chocolate cooks filling the Mindscape. He sighed happily.

 

“Hey,” Virgil whispered from the doorway. He was leaning into the frame, not trying to hide that he had been watching the day dreaming Patton. He was eyes weren’t quite focused on him, probably still trying to wake up from a characteristic nap.

“Hey,” Patton smiled as he noticed the other had changed back into his fancy new purple patched sweatshirt.

“Done?” Virgil motioned to the large pile of drying dishes beside the sink.

Patton nodded his head slowly, unplugging the sink to let the water slowly drain out. A spiral of white bubbles and clear water. “Done.”

As Patton dried his hands, Virgil kept his eyes focused on the uncovered burn on the older side’s hand. He must have unwrapped it to do the dishes. Virgil still felt horrible that Pat had gotten hurt in his- their kitchen. Of course Patton in general was a klutz and always getting bumps and bruises, but this was different. This was Virgil’s space. Aside from his room, it was where Virgil had the most control over his surroundings. If he hadn’t been freaking out over who knows what, Patton wouldn’t have been injured. Patton may be 99% fine, but he wasn’t 100% A-Okay and Virgil hated that.

Patton looked up rather suddenly and his brows knitted together. “What’re you thinking about, kiddo?”

A smile crept up onto Virgil’s lips. Patton was feeling better. Virgil gave shrug. His voice still wasn’t working quite properly and complex answers were not going to happen. He didn’t mind though, Patton had his voice back. Patton was back.

Patton’s face still read confused and a bit concerned but he dropped the subject. “Do you want to watch a movie while we wait for Ro and Lo to come back?”

Something was off with Patton but Virgil couldn’t pinpoint exactly what. Movies meant cuddling. He didn’t think he was in much of a cuddly mood, but if it would help Patton relax with whatever it was, he would do it.

“Popcorn.” Virgil moved toward the cabinets and waved Patton away toward the living room.

“Popcorn sounds great.” There could not be a movie without popcorn. When it was movies with Patton, it was definitely one that would make you cry a good cry and extra super buttery popcorn. If they weren’t projections of Thomas’ mind, he would have been concerned for Patton’s health with the amount of melted butter he ate.

Patton shuffled awkwardly around Virgil and disappeared toward the DVD case in the living room. Virgil could faintly hear Patton muttering to himself, probably trying to decide which film to watch. He had to admit, there was a very good selection in the Mindscape. Sure they could pull up Netflix or Hulu but there was something nostalgic that came with staring at the spines of DVD cases.

He retrieved the bag of popcorn and tossed it into the microwave putting the timer on for a minute and a half. Unfortunately, the sound of the microwave and popping popcorn drowned out Patton’s quiet murmurings. Virgil had hoped to catch some so he could potentially gain some insight into Patton’s behavior if he was in fact not talking about the movie selection.

Virgil emerged from the kitchen skillfully holding two cups of water and the incredibly greasy popcorn. A large wad of napkins were pinned between his elbow and his side. Patton was still whispering to himself while crouched in front of the DVD case.

“Here.” Virgil placed the beverages and popcorn on the table watching Patton as he nearly jumped out of his skin. Patton grabbed a seemingly random case and direct it toward Virgil.

“Here, is this one good?”

The Little Mermaid. Virgil gave a slow nod of approval. He didn’t care what was chosen. Honestly he was just going to end up watching Patton he entire time. Something was really messing the father figure up and he was not going to stop until he figured out what it was. Patton would do the same for him.

The movie was loaded up and Virgil awkwardly claimed the middle of the couch. Patton immediately curled into his side and gave a tight hug. Virgil tried his best not to tense at the sudden contact. “Breathe.” Virgil wheezed out, the pressure around his chest was restricting his breathing.

“Breathing is probably important, kiddo. Sorry,” Patton whispered dropping his arms from his friend.

Once air was circulating in his lungs again, Virgil opened his arms. Patton took the invitation and reattached himself to Virgil, with a lighter grip of course.

“Can we watch without sound, just the captions?” Patton asked Virgil’s chest. Virgil nodded and sorted out the settings so they could watch as he suggested. Having to focus on reading the captions would certainly help Patton, he reasoned. Virgil himself did it all the time.

 

They stayed like that most of the movie with Patton hanging on to Virgil for dear life. The popcorn and drinks sat untouched and forgotten on the table. Virgil had attempted to shift himself into a more comfortable position once, but Patton let out the saddest whimper that caused Virgil to freeze in his tracks. He was stuck in a more uncomfortable position but the welfare and comfort of Patton overrode his own.

There wasn’t much Virgil could do for Pat though. He didn’t have enough words to provide comfort nor enough words to figure out what was causing his friend so much distress. It was bad. The movie didn’t seem to be helping. Virgil really needed someone else there. Roman… or Thomas… or even Logan. Anyone. Someone. Please.

Virgil heard a sniffle. Oh god, when had Patton started crying? He hesitantly tightened his grip to let Patton know that he was still there for him. Virgil could do this. The others had helped him through a number of attacks surely he could do the same for them… with whatever this was.

“Stop the movie.” Patton whispered and buried his face into Virgil’s jacket. Trying to move as little as possible, Virgil grabbed the remote and paused the movie. Patton clenched a fist, taking up a wad of purple and black fabric. A muffled sigh left his lips as a shudder ran through his body.

“I should probably tell you why I’m such a mess right now.” Patton rose to his feet in a blink of an eye. Cold emptiness wrapped itself around Virgil’s side instead of the characteristic warmth of his oldest friend. Patton sniffled. His eyes were bloodshot and darted around the room looking anywhere except for Virgil. Tear tracks shone on his face in the light of the TV. “I hate you.” Patton bolted from the room and disappeared up the stairs before Virgil had a chance to process what was going on. The moral side’s light blue glitter and sticker covered door slammed shut, the echo reverberating through the quiet home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates may be a bit MIA this week. I might do some short works in this universe or this. It depends what I have time for. But just wanted to give a heads up.
> 
> Fun fact: I post these normally at like midnight/ 1 AM. Who needs a proper sleep schedule?


	8. Sometimes Quiet is Violent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! I had planned to get this out around last Thursday but it didn't pan out.  
> For forgiveness, this chapter is about twice as long as a normal chapter.  
> Enjoy!

_I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you._

The sound swam through the air weaving its way through everything. The chair. The table. The couch. The still paused movie. All were being infected with the hate. Each newly infected host simply spawned more hate, growing as time passed.

_Ihateyou. Ihateyou. Ihateyou. Ihateyou. Ihateyou._

The sound finally broke through Virgil’s skull and entered his empty brain. It was even worse there. The small enclosed space allowed rapid ricochets that blurred together only to amplify their noise. How could Patton have said that? He thought they were having a pretty fine morning all things considered. Virgil broke his breakfast rule and make some Patton-cakes for the two to share. The conversation was going pretty alright before the odd story came up. Was Patton mad that he didn’t understand it? But Patton had seemed just as confused as he was about the whole thing.

_IhatyouIhatyouIhateyouIhateyouIhateyou_

What if it was because he made Patton do the dishes? He had left the kitchen is such a mess. Oh god, he had just run away from Patton after he finished eating. It was probably that. He was acting as the host and then bolted at the first chance. He had dinned and dashed. Everything started going south when Patton realized he was watching from the doorway. God, Virgil had messed up. He screwed up so bad and so many times that Patton couldn’t handle it anymore.

_HATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATE_

Virgil had broken Patton. Not in a cutesy broke someone’s heart way. No, he broke Patton in a shattering all your bones way. When the others came back they were going to hate him too. Roman was going to kill him, literally kill him. He didn’t care what Logan said about them not being able to die. Roman was going to find a way to kill him. Roman was creative, Virgil wouldn’t dare bet against that.

Virgil’s hands pushed painfully into his ears. No matter how much he tried, he could not block out the noise that was coming from within his head. He was vaguely aware that he was stuck in a downward spiral but there wasn’t much that could be done. He was alone… alone with the repeating voice of Patton as he told Virgil he hated him.

///////////////////////////////

**_Crash!_ **

Virgil’s eyes snapped open at the sudden sound. His mind immediately took off running. _What was that? Sound. Loud sound. Where? Need to run, Need to be safe. Run. Safe. Hide. Patton. Help Patton. Keep him safe. Roman. Logan. Keep them safe. Move. Run. Fight. Get up. Up. UP. UP! UP!_

Virgil was frozen. Regardless of how much his mind screamed at him, his body was locked in its curled position. His eyes widened. If he couldn’t move, it meant that he couldn’t get away. If he couldn’t get away, he couldn’t be safe. He was going to get hurt. No, he was going to die. Whatever made the sound was going to kill him.

The input from his eyes finally broke through his internal spiral. The world didn’t look right everything was at an odd angle. He was laying on his side partially under the coffee table. It was a good thing his body wasn’t responding otherwise he would’ve got through the table or, even worse, he could’ve split his head open.

His mind was slowing and quieting, never going completely silent but calming enough to take in more of his surroundings and let his memories come back. Virgil had dried tear tracks streaking down his face, probably ruining his makeup. He had been spiraling down and broke down sobbing. He had tried curling up on the couch in a vain attempt for any comfort but instead he had crawled on to the floor. The closed in feeling from being under the table gave only a small bit of comfort, but it was more than he had on the couch.

His breathing was too fast. His body was shaking violently. His nails dug into his palms, luckily his chewed nails were too short to break the skin. He squeezed his eyes until he saw fireworks. Patton hated him.

The sudden flood of memories threated to pull him back under, but the voice screaming in his head was still worried about the source of the crash. As Thomas had once said, he listened because he was loud. Virgil’s body was still drained from his earlier attack, but he did need to get up. He could not stay there in the pathetic ball on the floor. Patton may still hate him, but his job was to protect the others and he would not stop doing his job.

Slowly the pins and needles feeling in his limbs filtered into his mind. He needed to ignore it. To get feeling back in his heavy limbs, he started wiggling his fingers and toes. The blood was being to flow and the pins and needles started to fade. Virgil slowly crawled from his safe spot under the table and crouched in an attempt to look over the couch which currently shielded him.

He had figured out the sound had come from the kitchen so in theory he should be safe if he popped his head out for a split second. Virgil took a shaky deep breath. He could do this.

His knees wobbled as he rose slowly from his crouch to see over the cushions, daring to go up only as much as needed. With his eyes above the back of the couch, he could see into the kitchen and could finally uncover what was invading his home.

Patton.

Virgil let go of a breath he didn’t know that he was holding. It was just Patton. Everything was okay. His heart started to calm as his shoulders dropped with the release of all of his tension.

Patton had put back on his cat onesie, the hood pulled up over his head. He had his back to Virgil and seemed to be cleaning the counter. Patton must have been hungry and came down to make himself food….and he hadn’t bothered Virgil to make him something special because he hated him. Being the klutz that he is, Patton had probably dropped a plate or a pot on the floor.

Virgil must have released a small sigh or involuntarily sniffled because Patton suddenly whipped around. Before Virgil had the chance to duck back down, Patton sunk out. The image of Patton’s frightened face bore into Virgil’s skull. The older side had been crying as well, eyes red and puffy even from this far away. He wasn’t sure how long he had been asleep on the floor, but he was sure Patton only recently stopped crying and had been crying for a long time. The blood had drained from Patton’s face in the short second that he had seen the top of Virgil’s head peaking over the couch. His red eyes had gone wide as though he had seen a ghost.

But once again, Patton had bolted away from Virgil. Since his brain was no longer screaming about the intruder in the Mindscape, it changed gears back to insulting Virgil’s friendship skills. He had upset the representation of someone’s feelings enough for them to hate him. He wasn’t even entirely sure why.

Under all those self-deprecating thoughts, Virgil knew in his heart that he had to apologize to Patton. Hate wasn’t an easy thing to come back from and Virgil honestly did not think he could change Patton’s mind, but he had to do something. He might have only recently come to feel as a part of the family, but Patton had always been there accepting him from the beginning. You don’t just throw that type of thing away.

His body was still trembling as he made his way from his hiding spot and up the stairs. The exhaustion from his earlier attack combined with the new anxiety of trying to face Patton was overwhelming but he pushed slowly up the steps. He gripped the railing with whitened knuckles. If he let go he was going to collapse and tumble down the stairs for sure.

After far too long, Virgil finally reached the next floor and was standing in front of Patton’s bright door. He had his fist raised, posed to knock. Patton didn’t want to see him, obviously. It was probably incredibly rude to interact with people who definitely didn’t want to interact with you. Both sides knew that said person did not want to interact with you. Virgil needed to talk with Patton though, he needed to know what was going on.

Patton definitely heard him lumbering up the stairs and knew he was awkwardly standing in front of the door. He couldn’t leave. Virgil decided he would just try to speak to him through the door. There was no need for face-to-face. He took some more deep breathes, allowing his anxious mind to focus on feeling his chest expand and contract. He could do this.

The knock filled the empty hallway. Virgil waited for a sound of acknowledgement, but as the minutes passed none came. He clenched his jaw and forced the word out of his uncooperative mouth. “Pat?”

“Pat... is not here right now. Please leave a message after the beep.” Patton’s whispering voice immediately replied.

Virgil rubbed the back of his neck. Patton probably hated him more for coming to bother him. What little courage he had had now disappeared and was nowhere to be found.

“Sorry.” Virgil whispered and darted down the stairs before he could get a reply.


	9. Call Me, Beep Me, If You Wanna Reach Me

Virgil stood awkwardly in the middle of the living room. He had the strong urge to curl up under the table once again, but he didn’t want to be in the common space if Patton wanted to be there. Guilt wracked his mind as he realized he didn’t even know if Patton had successfully gotten food while he was in the kitchen. Virgil was preventing his friend from eating. He was starving Patton. He viciously rubbed his hands up and down his face as though that would scrub away the thoughts.

That left his room. He really did not want to be alone in there. He desperately needed someone around him, whether it was to keep his thoughts at bay or to explain what in the world was going on. Virgil quietly pled that Logan or Roman would show up. How long had the others even been gone? It certainly felt like it had been days since he last saw them. He had fallen asleep at least twice today and his internal clock was a mess.

 _What if I’m still asleep_ , the quiet optimistic part of Virgil spoke up, _and this is some crazy messed up nightmare?_

One of his reoccurring nightmares was in fact that the other sides finally threw off the masks of caring family and showed their true hatred toward him. But this just felt too different, too real. In those nightmares, it was always some cruel joke as the others laughed at how gullible he was. This time, though, Patton was as upset about the whole thing as Virgil was.

Something buzzed against Virgil’s thigh startling him which sent him jumping backwards and tripping over the coffee table. In a motion that could only be described as cat-like elegance, he landed in a casual sitting position on the couch.

Virgil cautiously moved his hand to his left pocket. His phone. He let out a frustrated sigh. He had gotten surprised by the new message vibration on his phone. Virgil curiously pulled the phone from his pocket. Aside from absently scrolling through the internet, Virgil didn’t use his phone much. The others had learned early that Virgil wanted to try to get the words out rather than taking the easy way and type things out. Regardless of the fact that forcing himself to speak when he really shouldn’t be normally prolonged his nonverbal periods, he was stubborn and wasn’t going to let this get in his way.

New message from Logan.

Virgil opened up the messenger app. Logan’s normally formal and stiff text was instead a string of seemingly random words. Logan was having a bad day as well, Virgil reminded himself. He tapped his thumbs to the sides of his phone trying to decipher what was going on. The lack of any sort of sense was really concerning to Virgil. Sure Logan forgot words, but he always found a way to say what he wanted. He always made sense. The tapping of his thumbs increased trying to find anything that would calm him within the string of words.

The constant vibration of his phone pulled him from the text. The screen changed to the basic calling screen. Roman was calling. Forgetting for a second that he couldn’t really speak, Virgil tapped the green answer button and put it on speaker.

“Ah! Verge finally! Do you know how many times I have tried to call you?” Roman’s energetic voice filled the room.

Roman had paused waiting for an answer he wasn’t going to get. In the silence, Virgil could make out Logan reprimanding Roman.

“He has no words, Roman!” Virgil could picture the logical side gently pinching the bridge of his nose. “I sent a messenger pigeon to him, there was no need for this.”

“You sent gibberish Specs. I know what you meant to write and I still have no idea what you wrote!” From the way Roman’s voice changed volume, Virgil could tell the creative side was failing his arms about.

Virgil awkwardly cleared his throat in an attempt to get them back on the topic of the call. Virgil hated phone calls, even when he could speak fine, so whatever this was had to be very important.

“Ah yes, sorry my Silent Knight.” The phone returned to Roman’s ear. “The reason I- we are calling is that there seems to be a problem returning to the Mindscape.”

“Soft!” Logan called from the background. Virgil felt his heart speed up. Had Patton closed the link to the Mindscape because of him? Or maybe Virgil had done it? He’s only ever ducked out which was a different type of connection severing but he had been so worked up today with everything going on.

“Lo, I’m the one on the phone not you!” Roman called back. “Anyway, we request that you reestablish the connection for us.”

There was some shuffling on the other end of the line and Virgil ever so faintly heard Roman whisper, “Lo’s having a really bad day, like one of the early days bad. He really needs to get back home.”

Virgil closed his eyes and tried to feel out the bridge of consciousness that allowed them to manifest themselves into the physical world. It wasn’t just broken, it was missing entirely. Oh no. His anxiety started to rise, slowly at first but rapidly gaining speed.

All he could get out to Roman was some strained, frightened noises.

“Deep breath Verge. You know, your 4-7-8 thing.” Roman said over the other’s pathetic noises.

Another garbled noise rose from Virgil and he threw his phone across to the other side of the couch. Alone. He needed to be alone. Cannot handle people right now. Need silence. A small part of his brain snorted at that. He was completely alone and the others couldn’t get back and he was panicking that he needed to be alone. How much more alone could you get?

Although Roman had moved the receiver away from his mouth, Virgil could still faintly hear the other frantically trying to get Logan to tell him what to do. They seemed to have released that Virgil has shifted into the more severe ‘cannot handle anything’ type of nonverbal episode and the line fell silent.

Virgil could tell that they hadn’t hung up as there was obviously still more to talk about. He couldn’t decide if that was a good thing or not. He felt horrible that this had happened and wanted it to be over as quick as possible so his friends didn’t have to wait on him. But also, he knew that as the world may be on fire around him, he was not alone. Even if Patton hated him, the others were still his friends…at least until they found out about the falling out...

Quiet soothing sounds of conversation floated through the phone. Roman and Logan were talking to each other. Virgil was mildly aware that Logan’s part of the conversation was complete nonsense. At least the focus was no longer on him and his freaking out.

A few minutes had passed and the conversation on the other end was beginning to wane. Virgil had been able to calm himself without getting drowned by a full blown attack. He still didn’t think that he could handle them right now. He needed some time. Maybe some very intermittent texting would work better right now.

Virgil grabbed his phone slowly, as though he was approaching a wild creature. He slowly pushed 2-9-3 then hung up. He was exhausted. As much as his body screamed at him to take a nap on the couch, Virgil remembered Patton and the kitchen. He was not going to mess up Paton’s health. He slowly sunk out and appeared in his room. Just a few minutes to recover and he would get back to the task at hand.

Virgil was asleep before his head hit the pillow.

Unknown to the passed out Virgil, a string of rapid fire text messages from Patton lit up his phone. The previews on the lock screen showed a variety of colored hearts, broken hearts, and crying face emojis.


	10. Who Ya Gonna Call?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time no see. I really need to figure out how to write Patton's POV... Well anyways, enjoy.

Virgil woke to his phone ringing, Roman…again. Technically he had been awake for a while, no more than ten minutes, but he had been willing himself to slip back into unconsciousness. Maybe if he slept enough, the whole situation with Patton and the broken connection to the physical world would have sorted themselves out. But as he had been told by nearly everyone, including the sleepy figment himself, sleeping away your problems were not going to solve them.

By the time his arms are woken up and started moving toward the phone, Roman had hung up. Virgil get out a small groan as he stretched and grabbed the device. Virgil quickly read through some more incoherent texts from Logan and clicked away the missed call notifications from Roman. After all the annoying red notification bubbles were gone from his screen, Virgil started scrolling through Tumblr. Roman would call back again soon. Virgil had often wondered if Roman in fact been Impatience earlier in his existence.

The Tumblr page suddenly changed to the call screen. Virgil accepted before the phone could start vibrating.

“Hey,” Virgil squeaked out and skillfully rolled up into a sitting position. This was probably going to take some time. Between his limited speech, Logan not really making much sense, and Roman’s ‘extra’-ness, this was going to be an interesting call.

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Virgil hated him. Patton just knew it. He had sent no less than one hundred messages to his dark strange son. He had yet to receive any sort of reply. Virgil’s anxiety had led to him turning off the ‘message read’ feature on his iPhone, so Patton didn’t even know if the texts had been read yet or not.

Patton really couldn’t blame him. How else did he think someone would handle being told that they were hated? But he just needed to explain. It wasn’t his fault! He was being haunted by a very very rude ghost. It certainly was a Casper the Un-Friendly Ghost.

The ghost had said such horrible things to Virgil; manipulating Patton’s echoing for his own malicious gain. It hurt Patton to have said those things. Perhaps he should have been more wary of when the ghost has showed up in the kitchen, but he always gave the benefit of the doubt and saw the good in folks. Sure he was rather frightened about a ghost suddenly being in the Mindscape, one that only Patton could hear and was echoing, but the ghost had gotten Virgil to watch a movie with him. Given any other circumstance, curled up with Virgil watching a movie was an amazing experience.

But it was okay, Patton was going to fix everything. Once Virgil texted back, Patton could explain everything in his own words. When he knew Virgil was listening, Patton could apologize and tell him about the ghost that was now haunting their home. His dark strange son enjoyed those spooky things. He would know how to handle the ghost. It probably had gotten out from Roman’s imagination realm. Nothing had ever gotten out before but there was a first time for everything!

Virgil may get overwhelmed and blow things out of proportion sometimes, but Patton knew they could recover their friendship from this. Until Patton had explained the situation with this unseen ghost, he didn’t dare to see Virgil face to face. Having to run away when he started to hear the ghost was hurting his poor heart. Virge had looked so betrayed but Patton had to protect him from further abuse.

Patton would wait for the other side to get back to him. He wasn’t going to force it.

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Logan’s pocket buzzed. His eyes twitched under the damp cloth that rested atop them. The Advil he had taken earlier had helped dissipate the migraine, but the effects had been quick to wear off. Behind the constant throbbing of his head, Logan could hear Roman trying to make a plan with Virgil. He faintly registered that Roman was speaking quietly, or at least as quiet Roman could, and Virgil had started speaking two words at a time.

Prior to the phone call, Logan had attempted to detail his plan to the creative side but it hadn’t gone very smoothly. He knew what he wanted to say, how to direct Virgil into the Subconscious to check on the source of the consciousness bridge, but nearly all his words had disappeared from his mind. Logan did not possess a single artistic bone in his body, but in order to communicate he produced a crude diagram for Roman to dictate.

His phone vibrated again reminding him of his unread message. Moving slowly, he removed the phone from his pocket. “Ro,” Logan whispered and waved his phone around in the general direction of Roman. The weight in Logan’s hand disappeared and he heard Roman shuffle away. Logan gently patted his chest to ensure his folded up glasses still hung off his collar. Relaxing slightly at the comfort it brought, Logan returned to reciting…or rather attempting to recite the dictionary in his head.

Roman looked down at Logan’s phone in his hand. He unlocked the phone with his thumbprint, they were the same person after all. He smiled slightly remembering the last time he had held the phone, when Logan had found that reverse app for him. This time wasn’t too different from then, everyone stressed the heckity heck out. He didn’t think it this would resolve as quickly as last time though.

After a quick glance at the app, he opened the new message.

Patton: _Hey Lo! Could you pass on to Virgil that I want to talk to him? He hasn’t replied to me… :( Anyways! You’re the best! This was a great parent-teacher conference as always! <3 <3 <3 <3_

Roman scratched his head trying to come up with a Logan response. “That is something I am capable of accomplishing,” he typed out. Yeah, that sounded awkward and uncomfortable.

“You there?” Virgil whispered from Roman’s phone.

“Ah yes! Lo just needed some messages answered.” Logan winced at the sudden outburst. Roman whispered a barely audible sorry in Logan’s direction.

The other end of the phone went silent. Virgil sniffled before saying, “Patton?”

“Indeed, he seems to think you are ignoring him?”

Roman could hear Virgil shuffling his feet nervously. Once again silence took over the other end of the line.

“Can I-“ Roman started.

“No asking.” Virgil shook his head. Patton was the one that was ignoring him not the other way around. He had to focus on getting the others back right now, then he could worry about Patton.

“We’ll get back to the plan then?” Roman asked pocketing Logan’s phone and pulling out the chicken scratch of a plan. Virgil was stubborn and Roman was 99% sure he wouldn’t talk about it later, but Roman had to know what was going on with his friends. Patton and Virgil were closer than close so whatever had happened between them was big.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for over 100 kudos and over 750 hits. You all are awesome!


	11. We’re All in This Together

“Are you sure you won’t do it?” Roman whined and dramatically flopped onto the other end of the couch with an arm over his eyes.

“I will not.” Logan huffed and moved his legs away from the other side.

Roman glanced at the time on the TV box. He had gotten Thomas to hang out with Talyn and Joan in an attempt to keep him occupied while his sides were figuring things out. Now though, Roman was wishing that Thomas was here to do this call for him.

After going over the plan at least five time, Roman had offered to have Virgil call him once he was prepared and ready to go. So now Roman was waiting for a call so he could run an intervention. He would very slyly drop that the Subconscious could be a confusing place and therefore, he should be Patton along so he wasn’t alone. Slide it in smooth with the finesse he was graced with.

Roman jumped as his phone stated to vibrate. “Super sure?” Roman pleaded.

“I don’t do the….touching.” Logan grumbled and nudged Roman weakly with his foot.

Roman ran his free hand through his hair as he pressed the green answer icon. “Virge! Good to hear you. I didn’t think you were ever going to call! And look at you, calling someone willingly on the phone. Preparing for an adventure like a true prince!” Roman accented with a princely flourish of his hand.

“Calm down.” Virgil mumbled and shifted the phone to his other ear.

“You have everything prepared for your quest?”

“Yeah. Everything.”  Roman wasn’t sure what was needed to venture into the Subconscious. Logan was the only side who had ever ventured into the Subconscious and didn’t talk about it much. Roman’s fantasy based mind held images of franken-sides. Half forming sides forever forced to wander the dark and barren Subconscious, But he would also remember that Remy probably lived there. But also Remy rarely spent his time with Thomas. And who wouldn’t want to spend time with Thomas! It had to be to get away from the monsters that constantly surrounded him day to day.

“You there?” Virgil’s mechanical voice pulling Roman from his Subconscious spiral.

“But you are not fully prepared!” Roman exclaimed, the lightbulb going off in his mind.

“Wha- wha- what?” Virgil stuttered out.

“Soft.” Logan grumbled from the couch.

“Sorry, Virge, That’s not what I meant.” Roman quickly apologized. Finesse, Roman reminded himself. “But it can be dangerous to venture alone for your first time. Therefore, you shouldn’t go alone.”

Roman listened as Virgil’s breathing calmed down and he realized what Roman was insinuating. “Patton.” Virgil’s tone fell as a mix between sad and afraid.

“Look, whatever’s going on, you guys are going to have to solve it sometime.” Roman offered. “He really wanted to talk to you. He had texted a sad face emoji!”

Roman saw Logan shake his head out of the corner of his eye. That wasn’t exactly the right way to persuade Virgil into doing things.

Virgil mumbled something into the phone.

“You’ll have to speak clearer my Dark and Stormy Knight.”

“Hate……me…….” Virgil whispered, barely audible on the other end.

“No, Virge, no one hates you.” Roman’s boisterous voice softened. “I promise that that is not true.”

“Patton said.”

Roman scratched the back of his head, that didn’t sound like Patton at all. “Perhaps he was echoing a song. There is the line, ‘I hate you, I love you…’ See it wasn’t meant to be that he hates you.”

The rest of the lyric rang in Virgil’s mind, ‘I hate you. I love you. I hate that I love you.’ That really didn’t help at all. It only compounded his belief.

“What is this episode?” Logan questioned sitting up on his elbows. The wet rag dropped onto his chest.

“Patton may have told Virgil he hated him.” Roman shifted the phone and put it on speaker.

“Stop…bringing…” Virgil whispered very tempted to hang up on them, He had to focus on getting them back home. That was more important right now. Couldn’t they see that? Virgil could handle the pain and the isolation, he had for most of his existence. This wasn’t anything new.

“Why would it have written such a thing?”  Logan inquired as he placed the rag onto the table as to not dampen his polo.

“Like I said, he was probably trying to echo something and it just wasn’t exactly what he wanted,” Roman waved his arms about. Patton may have said he loved them all equally but there for sure was a special place in his heart for the anxious side.

“Weren’t there.” Virgil sounded muffled and far away.

Oh, they were probably working him up again. He had moved away from the phone’s microphone so they wouldn’t notice the sniffling.

“Just have a party conversation.” Logan offered as he adjusted his glasses.

“What?” Roman furrowed his brows in confusion. It was sort of like playing Password sometimes with Logan. He’d dance around the word he really wanted and left the others to guess the right one.

“No Patton.” Virgil interjected before Logan could explain himself.

It was rude and something Logan hated but he wasn’t going to talk to or about Patton. His tone may have been harsh, but he wasn’t mad. Did they not understand the need for them to get back? What would happen to Thomas if they couldn’t get back? And Patton couldn’t hate him if he saved the day….right?

“Listen…please.” Roman tentatively suggested. “There’s a bunch of weird stuff going on. We need to stick together okay. We’re all the same person for goodness sake!”

Roman began pacing trying to order his rushing thoughts. “You’re all messed up. Logan’s all messed up. Pat’s all messed up. **I’m** all messed up. The bridge is all messed up!”

Virgil hunched up his shoulders. God, he was so wrapped up in his own thing with Patton that he didn’t notice Roman hadn’t spoken backward and now he just spoke Logan’s full name forward.

“Look. Get Patton on this line. We’re going to sort this whole thing out if it kills us!”

Virgil gave in. “No words.” He noted. Patton wouldn’t handle being in a group call well, with everyone talking. Virgil still didn’t feel comfortable being around Patton yet. Hate was a hard wound to heal.

Roman paused at that. “Ah! We can use Lo’s phone to text Patton!”

Roman grabbed Logan’s phone from the table, his thumbs sped across the keyboard.

Logan: _Hey Padre! It is the most princely prince in all the lands! We’ve got Virge and we’re going to sort all this nonsense out!_

Patton: _Ro, your majesty, thank you!_

Patton: _Please let my dark strange son know that there’s a very rude ghost in the Mindscape._

Logan’s phone continued to buzz as text after text as Patton tried to explain what was happening on his end. After a few minutes, Patton’s messages finally calmed down.

“Patton says that there is a ghost in the Mindscape. He theorizes that the ghost got out of my imagination realm, however that is very unlikely as you know I keep a stern hand over my kingdom.” Roman waved away Logan who was ready to interject. “Anyways, Patton had said that since the kitchen, he has been parroting this ghost. So he in fact doesn’t hate you Virgil. He actually loves loves loves loves loves loves loves loves….love loves loves loves loves you.”

“Ghost?” Virgil wasn’t sure how he felt about that.

“I will admit that I have come across ghosts in my realm. Easy creatures to dispatch of. Most are harmless.” Roman explained smiling at the thought of his smooth running kingdom. “He also mentions not to listen to anything he says vocally.”

Virgil took a deep breath. Patton was is friend, he could trust him. Patton wouldn’t lie…but this ghost might. Patton’s echo never bled into text so this had to be Patton. Maybe this ghost was what was causing such horrible ripples through the Mindscape. Get rid of the ghost from Patton, then Patton could use his own words and the bridge would be fixed and the others could come back.

In the back of his mind, he questioned where this ghost had come from. If it had come from Roman’s realm, what else was running loose in their home? Can’t worry about that now.

He would let his hope and belief in his friend guide him now.

“Okay.” Virgil nodded to his empty room. “Let’s do this.”


	12. Hey Ho, Let's Go!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look I'm back! I hope you all enjoyed that "totally planned" midstory break. I'm such a scene writer not a story one, but I'm back! Enjoy!

Virgil paced back and forth in the common room. TV, coffee table, kitchen, front door. Front door, kitchen, coffee table, TV. He wrung his hands nervously. They had all decided that Patton and Virgil would trek into the subconscious to fix the bridge and then they would handle the ‘ghost’ situation once everyone was together again in the Mindscape.  
Virgil huffed. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Patton… it was just…not too long ago Patton wasn’t actually Patton and “I hate you,” had actually come out of his mouth. Now when the nagging thoughts that his friendships were all just a sham showed up, his anxious paranoid brain could point out that one time Patton actually said that he hated him. It wasn’t some nightmare Virgil’s mind could make up, it had really happened.  
He looked down at his hands which were pulling each other apart. Logan had scolded him a number of times for it. He could dislocate his fingers, wringing his hands like that, Logan warned. Virgil untangled his hands and wiped them on the front of his sweatshirt before hastily shoving them into his deep soft pockets. If they weren’t together he wouldn’t injury himself.   
As Virgil passed the stairs, he glanced up toward Patton’s room. Virgil being Virgil had arrived long before the time they had set. It gave him time to collect himself before the inevitable meeting with Patton again. Both Roman and Logan had tried to assure him that it was going to be alright, but nothing was sitting right with him. This whole situation was just rubbing him the wrong way.  
Before Virgil could wear a track into the floor anymore, he heard the light thump of Patton hopping down the stairs. Although his eyes were still red from crying earlier, Patton had an enormous smile on his face at seeing Virgil.  
He opened his mouth as though to say something before clamping it shut. Virgil raised an eyebrow but Patton gave a big two thumbs up.  
Virgil let his gaze linger a few extra seconds at the older side before taking a deep breath. As he exhaled, he shook out some of the tension that had been building within him. Everything was going to be alright. Just a casual stroll into the unknown and unpredictable Subconscious while following instructions from someone with a brain injury…  
He replayed the plan in his head as he walked toward the front door. Logan advised them not to sink into the Subconscious; you could never know for sure where you would end up. It would probably be very disorienting, but Logan promised certain things like the bridge did not move. All they had to do was get to the bridge and fix it, whatever that might entail, then sink back into the Mindscape.   
With his hand shaking slightly on the doorknob, he looked back at Patton. Patton once again flashed a thumbs up and Virgil pushed the door open.  
Immediately Virgil could see why Logan was the only one who ever ventured into the Subconscious. He was immediately surrounded by black emptiness but it felt as though the space was packed full with barely a spot to stand. Virgil grit his teeth trying to ignore the growing claustrophobic feeling and his rising shoulders.  
He wanted to look back to make sure Patton made it, but everything began to ripple as though he was looking through water. To steady himself, he slammed his eye shut. Slowly he adjusted his speeding breaths to the 4-7-8 pattern. It was overwhelming, as if he was leaping through a portal to another world. Unlike Roman’s imagination realm, the laws that governed this place seemed to play by their own rules.   
The claustrophobic weight started to lift from Virgil’s chest while his nausea subsided. He could do this. He was the fight or flight, the protector of them all. He inhaled deeply. On the release he shook out his arms letting the tension and unease leave him.   
Something closed around Virgil’s left hand. Flinching away, Virgil opened his eyes ready to run away from whatever was lurking here. To his surprise, it was just Patton.   
Virgil let out an embarrassed huff of air that could have been interpreted as a chuckle. He held out his hand and watched as Patton’s fingers intertwined with his own. Thoughts of an imposter Patton left his mind. He was just grateful he wasn’t facing this alone.   
Patton gave Virgil’s hand a light squeeze and gave a soft hum of comfort. With a tight smile, Patton gently pulled Virgil into motion. Neither wanted to spend any more time in the Subconscious than they had to.  
Virgil let himself be guided by Patton, not really paying attention to where they were going. There was a tightness in his chest and he couldn’t tell if it was his own natural anxiety or if it was an affect from being in the Subconscious. Regardless, he did not want to find out what would happen to Thomas if he spiraled into a panic attack while he was there. They knew from Logan’s trips that Thomas would be okay while they were there but Logan never stayed for too long. What if they got lost? Would they fade and become part of the nothingness?   
Patton felt Virgil’s grip tighten and saw his shoulders start to creep out. As far as he could tell, the ghost hadn’t followed him in but he still didn’t trust his voice. He couldn’t let himself hurt Virgil again.   
Patton gave a gentle squeeze of his hand and slowed his stride to match the distracted pace of his dark strange son. The other blinked a few times, emerging from his deep thoughts. Patton flashed a big comforting smile. They were going to find the bridge and fix it easy-peasy, Patton wished he could say. Virgil seemed to understand the gesture and nodded. “Okay.”   
“Okay.” Patton repeated and gave the younger side’s hand one more squeeze.   
“We’re going to be fine,” whispered the ghost in Patton’s ear.   
Patton flinched and clamped his mouth shut. He was not going to let this dastardly creature use him as a puppet any more. His brain screamed at him to repeat it as it played over and over in his mind. Patton knew it wouldn’t go away anytime soon. He clenched his jaw harder, feeling blood slowly escape his tongue.   
Virgil sent a reassuring squeeze to Patton, unsure what had frightened the older side. He looked around the area in vain trying to figure out where they were. It felt as though they were walking for ages. Logan had said that it would not take more than 10 minutes to get to the bridge, so there was no way they had been walking for long….unless of course they were going the wrong way….


	13. How Does He Know Where We're Going?!

Virgil finally stopped, the anxious knot him his stomach too much to ignore anymore. Something was wrong with how they were going. He had been blindly following Patton for the past who knows how long. His arm strained as Patton took a few more steps, not realizing the other had stopped.

Patton dropped his hand and looked back at Virgil confused. He waved his hand in a ‘come on, lets’ go’ motion. Virgil shook his head looking around the uncomfortable space.

“Wrong way.” Virgil squeaked not looking anywhere near Patton.

Patton shook his head. Sure it was confusing in here, but he knew where he was going. He had a very good internal compass. Patton extended his hand again toward Virgil.

Virgil huffed and motioned to the ground. He wanted to sink back home and start over. “Home.” He added when Patton gave a confused look.

There was a flash of disappointment on Patton’s face at Virgil’s distrust. He knew it was his fault, or more so this pesky ghost. Virgil was always going to be a bit paranoid but there was always an undercurrent of trust in his fellow sides that could push back the anxiety at least for a little while.

Although it stung a bit, Patton nodded. They could go back and start again.

Neither moved for a few moments. Panic overtook Virgil’s face. They couldn’t get back.

 

Roman stared lazily at the TV while lounging on the couch. Netflix was continuously running through the seasons of The Office. He had stopped paying attention long again. Logan had disappeared upstairs to take a warm shower, siting his still pounding headache. Ever since he had gotten hurt, his head was easily aggravated by stress.

A couple episodes back, Roman had knocked on the bathroom door just to make sure the logical side hadn’t passed out in there. Logan replied that he was fine and was just sitting with the water dropping on his head.

The room went silent as Netflix began to start up the next episode. Roman hoped that Virgil and Patton were alright. They hadn’t been in contract with him for a good long while. He drummed his fingers on the couch following the rhythm of the theme song.

Keys jungled outside of the front door. Roman could hear the fumbling as the keys couldn’t get into the lock. Roman let out a dramatic sigh and raised himself from the couch. He bent his back hearing it crack, taking his time walking toward the door.

The door finally unlocked and Thomas nearly fell face first into the floor. Luckily mysterious arms caught him before he could fall. Roman froze.

He couldn’t sink out. Was he visible? The sides had never been out when Thomas was around others. Cameras could pick them up, so that was something. But also cameras could pick up ghosts and paranormal things humans couldn’t. How were you supposed to explain you were part of someone else?

Before Roman could answer any of his own questions or decide what to do, the mysterious arms started pushing the half collapsed Thomas into the house. Thomas was simultaneously thrashing about trying to break away from the supportive grasp and utterly exhausted.

“You’re home,” the owners of the arms spoke. Joan. The orange beanie was just visible behind Thomas, but they were too focused on their friend to notice the stunned Roman.

“I have to…have to…get back,” Thomas pleaded still flailing. Thomas’ widen frightened yes finally landed on Roman. “PRINCEY!”

Thomas’ unexpected outburst caused Joan to drop Thomas onto the living room’s carpet, just missing the couch they had been trying to navigate to. Roman jumped backward. His back hit into the staircase.

The resulting thud had Joan snap their head up. “Oh what the –“

“What’s wrong with Thomas?” Logan had somehow appeared at the base of the stairs, his damp hair the only sign he had been in a burning shower for the past couple hours.

“LOGAN!” Thomas shouted upon seeing the logical side.

Joan was still stunned, their eyes darting between the two characters.

“Joan,” Logan tried to get the attention of their friend. “I…want…to understand…the past…with Thomas.”

Thomas curled himself into a tight ball on the floor, but kept his eyes locked on the bespectacled side. His mouth was repeating the same few shapes but no sound accompanied.

Logan narrowed his eyes slightly trying to read Thomas’ lips. Roman finally started moving and helped Joan onto the couch. He moved to help do the same to Thomas, but Thomas let out a pained shriek upon seeing Roman’s hands moving toward him.

“He’s having a fight, Roman.” Logan reprimanded and crouched to get move level with the frightened host.

Observing Thomas’ lips, he had moved on to saying a string of two words now. Logan squinted and rubbed the rim of his glasses.

“….Virgil?”


	14. Words Fail, There's Nothing I Can Say

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: panic attack, dissociation-ish

“Virgil.” Logan repeated a bit louder this time trying to get the person before him to respond. He had stopped mouthing words now. Logan couldn’t be sure if he was being stared at or stared through.

“No, it’s Thomas.” Joan spoke from the couch confusion still consuming their face.

“Not quite,” Logan said rubbing the back of his head. It was rude not to raise his head to establish eye contact with Joan, but he couldn’t risk missing any lip reading.

Logan opened his mouth to properly explain, but all the words seemed to disappear from his mind. He made a frustrated noise and waved his hand toward the pair sitting on the couch. He needed to focus on the task at hand, helping calm down Virgil.

Logan tried one more time. “Virgil.”

He absently thought this must be what Virgil felt like with this mutism. There was a want and an understanding of what was to be said but just couldn’t. There was still no acknowledgement and Virgil was still entirely freaking out. The reaction to Roman’s nearing arms meant that grounding through touch was out of the question. He just would have to wait for Virgil, or perhaps Thomas to come back to them.

Logan inhaled deeply and looked up at Joan and Roman. Joan was slightly more with it, but they were still in shock. Roman was just confused about the whole thing. He could see the want in Roman’s eyes to ask for an explanation, but from the wave before he knew Logan had to do it at his own pace.

“Thomas…isn’t in control…” Logan spoke quietly glancing down at the huddled shaking form. “The group…in the space…uh, the new place…”

“Pat and Virge in the subconscious.” Roman supplied.

“Virgil…he’s battling…” Logan scrunched his face slightly.

Roman summoned his sword as though he could fight off whatever was harming his friends. At the disappointed shake of Logan’s head, Roman returned his sword to the Mindscape. Logan pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to pull a more appropriate word.

“Episode.” Logan nodded satisfied with that.

“A panic attack.” Joan announced. “Virgil, Thomas’ anxiety, is in his subconscious and having a panic attack.”

“Correct.” Logan watched as Virgil tightened his ball. “He’s overwhelmed Thomas.”

“Not purposefully of course!” Roman suddenly interjected. “Lo said it would be overwhelming in there and there’s stuff going on with Pat. It’s completely understandable why this is happening.”

“Limbo… neither fully here or there.”  Logan muttered and moved slightly farther from Virgil. He was caught in both the subconscious with Patton and here in the living room with Roman, Logan, and Joan. There was an unintentional power struggle going on in there. The deep and primal instincts of the subconscious boosting Virgil's affect on the host. Logan had theorized the essence of Thomas himself rested in there somewhere. He had never dared search for it though, there were boundaries even if they were technically the same person.

“Calm him,” Logan looked up at Roman. There was an uncharacteristic pleading and defeated look in the logical side’s eyes. He had been the one to send them in there. He couldn’t get to Virgil and calm him down. He couldn’t speak his mind the way he wanted to. He couldn’t…

Roman placed a gently hand on Logan’s shoulder and the two swapped positions. Logan normally helped Virgil with the panic attacks. He was calmer and logical and in control, Roman was…not.

“Hey Virge.” Roman whispered as he sat cross-legged.

Finally, Virgil seemed to focus on what was around him. His frightened eyes locked onto the fanciful side. Roman let a smile break across his face.

“There’s a bit much going on right now isn’t there,” Roman tread lightly keeping his voice optimistic.

Virgil gave a slow long blink. _Yes_

“I want to help you, okay?”

Long blink.

Roman paused to gather his thoughts racking his brain for how to properly calm the younger side down. “In your head, I want you to try to think of five things you see in the living room okay?”

Virgil closed his eyes.

“Hey, no no.” Roman coaxed. “Come here. We’re sitting in the living room together okay. The carpet, you feel that?”

Virgil’s eyes had that faraway look in them again when he opened them.

“Yeah Virge, there you go.” Roman desperately wanted to grab hold of his hand and move it across the old carpet. “You want to feel the carpet right? Just drop your arm, okay?”

Long blink.

Virgil didn’t move. Two short blinks. _No._

“That’s fine my Dark and Stormy Knight.” Roman paused again trying to remember a different tactic.

“Air.” Logan said from the couch and Joan nodded in agreement.

“4-7-8, right?” Long blink. “I’ll count, and you try to match it. Take your time.”

The room sat in silence as Roman counted, trying to emulate the monotonous metronome that Logan could do. It was awkward and uncomfortable but Virgil’s breathing very slowly began to better match the pattern.

Logan began whispering to Joan, attempting to fill them in on the events of the day and their existence. Virgil dropped his arm out of his ball, the back of his hand resting on the carpet. His fingers twitched slightly. He could feel it.

“There you go Virgil.” Roman smiled again. “How about three things you can feel?”

The hand on the carpet twitched, one. The other hand curled tighter around a wad of Thomas’ shirt, two. He let out a shaky exhale onto his chest, three.

“If you can Virge, whenever you’re ready, we need Thomas back okay?” Roman said gently.

Long blink.

Roman continued counting again. Virgil’s hand was now flexing with the numbers. Even the small movements rubbing on the carpet gave him something to focus on. Now they just had to wait.


	15. One to Beam Up

The atmosphere in the living room had calmed significantly. Netflix had finally asked if anyone was still in the room, but no one had bothered to answer it. Joan had gotten over their initial shock, and was now rapid firing questions at Logan. Logan seemed to be enjoying himself, his words working better than before. It still wasn’t where he wanted it, but most of his frustration had dissipated. Virgil was still curled, but had managed to get up into a sitting position with his back pressed firmly into the side of the couch. His legs were drawn up while his forehead rested on his knees. Roman sat next to him cross-legged with his hand face-up beside him incase Virgil needed it.

If the bridge wasn’t broken, Patton wasn’t left alone in the Subconscious, and Virgil wasn’t Thomas, Roman thought it would have been a fun evening.

“Can I ask,” Joan started hesitantly, “about your speech?”

Logan’s face dropped slightly. He knew it would come up. It was abnormal for the sides to have their diverse range of speech impediments while Thomas did not possess any of his own.

“I talk backwards a lot.” Roman piped up from behind the arm of the couch. Logan let the corners of his mouth twitch up for a second. Roman turned slightly and rose his head so he could see them.

“I haven’t been doing it today, for some unknown reason- probably due to this whole kerfuffle going on in Thomas’ head…” Roman rambled. “but yes, I was cursed in the imagination realm I rule. A very unfortunate adventure went sideways.”

Roman shrugged. Compared to the other sides, he didn’t mind it much. Most of the time he didn’t realize he was doing it. Paired up with his app that Logan had found, his backward talking didn’t get in the way of his life.

Joan nodded, and a smile drew across their face as they connected that to the video Thomas had done recently. “That was you. For the reverse quote video.”

Roman felt his face heat up. “I was not handling my stress well and had been stuck speaking backwards. Logan and Thomas had come up with the idea.”

“Your speech bleeds through to Thomas sometimes then.” Joan thought back to all the times Thomas had said something weird and outside of his normal pattern.

“Pat echoes, either what was just said to him or quotes he’s heard. Virge had bouts of non-verbal periods…” Roman trailed off and looked down at his fellow side. Virgil was very self-conscious of his impediment. Prior to joining the Light Sides, everyone had assumed Virgil’s lack of talking was to be rude and mean. It had taken some time even after joining them that Virgil had explained. The stress from having to explain had caused him to spiral down into one of his ‘cannot interact with any living things’ non-verbal periods.

“I sustained an injury to my head.” Logan said simply. That was the smoothest he had even talked about it, not that he really talked about it.

Virgil suddenly jumped up. Standing on shaking legs, he had his fists up as though he was going to fight. His eyes had that far-away look in them again. His breathing was fast again but it didn’t seem like he was getting any air into him.

“Virge.” Roman whispered slowly standing up. He was pretty sure Virgil would end up causing himself to pass out.

“Virge.”

Virgil’s eyes darted around the room. A pained gargle quietly fell from his mouth.

“Shhh,” Roman hushed quietly. “We’re in the living room remember? Try to come back here.”

The shaking in Virgil’s legs got worse and he started to sway. There was a rapid fire of short blinks. _No. No. No. No. No. No._

“Can I touch you? I want to help you sit down so you don’t injury Thomas, okay?”

For what felt like minutes, Virgil stayed staring at something none of the others could see. Long blink.

Roman moved slowly and carefully, doing his best to narrate of his movement. After some resisting, Virgil’s knees started to bend and Roman lead him down back to the floor next to the couch. Virgil dug his hands into the carpet.

“What’s going on in there Virge,” Roman mumbled quietly to himself.

Virgil raised his one fist and rammed the back of it into Roman’s chest. Roman let out a hiss of pain. Virgil hit him again.

“It’s me Virge, please stop.”

Virgil hit Roman’s chest another time, this time harder.

“T!” Logan explained looking at Virgil’s fist. “Look at his thumb.” Virgil’s thumb was tucked between his pointer and ring finger.

“Thomas?” Joan offered looking from the couch. They didn’t want to intrude and Virgil seemed to need his space.

“You gotta let Thomas back in control.” Roman gently wrapped his hand around Virgil’s fist which still rested on his chest. “It’s scary but you’ll be okay.”

Roman felt Virgil’s hand repeatedly flex, relaxing and tightening but never uncurling fully. Virgil pushed a bit harder on Roman’s chest.

“Everything is gonna be fixed soon, but you have to go back to Pat. That’s it.” Roman squeezed Virgil’s fist slightly.

“You should probably leave, Joan,” Logan whispered. “We don’t…understand Thomas’ memory. We do not…desire more… Virgil, when he comes back.”

Joan shook their head. “The last time, uh, Thomas was around, he was at my place. Whether it was Virgil or Thomas, I said I would help him and be there for him. So I’m staying.”

Logan nodded slowly in understanding. The rapid change in environment would probably be frightening enough.

Tremors shook Virgil’s body before he slumped into Roman. The fanciful side looked up at Logan.

_Who do you think it is?_ Roman mouthed.

Both observed the relaxed body of their host. Either Virgil had lost consciousness or Thomas was back in control of his body. The ordeal was probably very draining, the enormous amount of panic and consciousness swapping definitely took a toll.

“Food and rest.” Logan muttered. He adjusted his glasses and stroked his tie.

Relief and uncertainty filled the room. Roman slowly lifted his host’s body bridal style and carried him upstairs to his room.


	16. No Sleep 'Till Brooklyn

Everything hurt. Virgil groaned and tried to curl up tighter. Nausea and a claustrophobic feeling emerged through his soreness. The uncomfortable feeling felt vaguely familiar. An annoyed sound rose from his throat and he buried his head into…What was he laying on? He didn’t remember being in his room?

Virgil’s eyes snapped open and scrambled away from where he had been laying. He was surrounded by the black empty yet full Subconscious. The memory of wandering around aimlessly with Patton flooded back into his mind, causing a headache to start. He sat there with his eyes closed, trying to calm his racing heart. The last time he had panicked, oh.

He had a panic attack. He had booted Thomas from the control of his own body, like a demonic possession. He hadn’t meant to. Thomas had to know that right?

Virgil closed his eyes. He felt solid. When Thomas had been fighting to get back in charge, Virgil had felt this horrible emptiness. He was constantly flickering between Patton in the Subconscious and the living room with the others. Virgil rubbed his face. He never wanted to do that again.

Patton.

Virgil’s eyes sprung open frantically looking for the light blue side. Who knows what could happen to a side left alone in here? Luckily he didn’t have to look far. Patton was sitting on the floor a bit away in front of him. Virgil vaguely registered that he had been laying on Patton.

The older side let a large bright smile fill his face, a smile that no one could resist. The corners of Virgil’s mouth began to creep upward before he made out a redness that covered the other’s teeth. Virgil furrowed his brow and pointed to his teeth.

Patton’s face lost a bit of color as his smile disappeared. His teeth hide behind his lips. Patton shook his head and gave a thumbs up.

“Your teeth.” Virgil whispered moving closer. The anxious side could see as Patton’s lip bulged, his tongue running across the front of his teeth. Patton shook his head once again.

Virgil rubbed his flat hand in a circle on his chest, _Please_.

Patton sighed. Once Virgil was seated next to him, he slowly stuck out his tongue. It was littered with teeth marks. Patton had closed his eyes, unable to look at the sadness on Virgil’s face. It had been the only way he could make sure he wouldn’t say what the ghost wanted him to. He couldn’t let himself hurt Virgil like that again. He wouldn’t be fooled again.

Thin cold arms wrapped around Patton. Patton blinked at the unexpected contact. Through blurry eyes, he could see Virgil pressed against him in an awkward hug. Patton moved slightly to wrap his own arms around the other side.

“Don’t…….do……that.” Virgil muttered tightening his grasp around Patton.

“Don’t do that,” Patton echoed into Virgil’s hair, tightening his own grasp.

//////////////////////////////

“AwGurls, ifyouwantedtovisit, youcould’vesaidso!”

Virgil blinked open his eyes, his head pressed into Patton’s chest. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes with the back of his hand. He hadn’t meant to fall asleep, but the day was really taking its toll on him.

“Remy?” Virgil slowly lifted his head while Patton let a big smile across his face repeating both of them, or more accurately making a string of incoherent sounds.

“Comeonyoulumps.” Remy extended his hand toward Patton and Virgil. His other hand was occupied with a Starbucks cup.

Virgil uncurled himself from Patton’s side. _You shouldn’t be drinking coffee,_ Virgil thought shaking his head. Virgil stretched feeling the soreness from before returning. He really needed to sleep for a few days.

Patton happily grabbed Remy’s hand and turned the pull up into a hug, whispering Remy’s words back to him. With Remy here, Virgil didn’t feel as sick as he had been. He faintly wondered if it was his conflicted feeling about Patton or the Subconscious itself that was making him feel that way.

Remy pried the dad side off of him and started back into the emptiness. Virgil stood, watching the two walk for a bit. They were having a conversation, or at least attempting to have one, about something Virgil couldn’t hear. He and Remy had a bit of a complicated relationship. Anxious feelings could keep Thomas from sleeping while Remy going out to who-knows-where would make Virgil anxious. It was a great cycle.

Patton seemed to have noticed that Virgil wasn’t following them as called back over his shoulder, “Come on, vamanos! Everybody let’s go!”

Virgil stated after them slowly. Quick enough to not get left behind but slow enough to let him have the space he wanted. Although Remy’s presence seemed to help, he still felt absolutely horrible. Sides weren’t supposed to be able to completely boot out their host from the controls. Sure they can influence to a degree, but this…what Virgil did was unheard of. What type of lasting effects would it have on Thomas or Virgil himself? What if Virgil had somehow corrupted Thomas’ soul? Where had Thomas ended up during that time? How long was he even controlling Thomas?

“HerewegoGurls, makeyourselvesathome!” Remy’s rapid speech pulled Virgil from his thoughts.

He couldn’t panic in here again. Virgil blinked, finally registering his surroundings. The living room. Virgil’s heart started pounding, had it happened again? His head whipped around looking for Roman, Logan, and Joan.

“Imadeitmyself.” Remy flopped down onto the couch. Virgil took a deep breath, finally realizing the contrast between the solid Remy and the waving and just out of focus couch. They were still in the Subconscious. He was okay.

“Ten points to Gryffindor!” Patton smiled and hesitantly sat down. Even with Remy on the couch, Patton didn’t quite believe it was real enough to sit on. But it was. He relaxed and leaned back, making himself comfortable.

“So….what’s….going…on…that...you’vedecidedtovisit? Loganneverhungout, alwaysallbusiness.” Remy muttered mock annoyance in his tone.

“Bridge.” Virgil answered and realized he was still standing in the middle of the room. He didn’t really know what to do with himself. He didn’t exactly want to sit on a couch that looked like it was a jiggling block of Jell-O.

“Why…are…you…taking…the…bridge?” Even behind his signature sunglasses, Virgil could see the other’s brows drop in confusion.

“I can fix it!” Patton supplied.

Remy’s face scrunched more. “…It’s not broken.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look it's Remy. He had issues with controling his speed / cadence that he talks at. If it's hard to read let me know, I'll try to think of something.


	17. Now We're Stressed Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rewrote this like 5 times. Go team. Enjoy!

“I… just… had… to… go… and… knock… Thomas… out.” Remy shrugged glancing at Virgil out of the corner of his eye. “He… was… flipping… out, and… I… was… not… in… the… mood… to… deal… with... that.”

_But that doesn’t make any sense,_ Virgil stumbled a few steps backward. Remy quickly conjured a new chair which Virgil dropped into. He had been unable to get back into the Mindscape and Roman and Logan still couldn’t get back. The others wouldn’t have sent him in here if they knew the bridge was okay. Remy had to be lying…but Virgil vaguely remembered passing out when he was in the living room.

Virgil dropped his head into his hands. None of this made any sense. Unless, maybe, somehow possessing Thomas fixed it? The bridge had never broken before and their plan to fix it was mostly just a stab in the dark…so don’t look a gift horse in the mouth?

This of course was Virgil we were talking about though. Something broke the bridge, something wanted them separated and wanted them to come down here to the Subconscious. Something was messing with Patton…and everyone else for that matter.

Virgil felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up. A shiver ran down his spine. Something was definitely not right. _Not right. Not right. Not right._

“Uh, hey there, uh Virge…uh, you doing alright there?” Remy asked with a slowness and hesitance that was, for once, by his own accord.

Virgil felt someone move closer to him and instinctively flinched away. The soft voice of Patton echoing Remy’s concern relaxed him slightly, and he allowed the elder rub soothing circles on his back.

_Everything is just wrong Pat. There’s just so much. I just don’t know. So much…_ Virgil shook his head. Everything was fixed, but he couldn’t let himself relax.

_Aw kiddo, it’s going to be okay. Remy said it was fixed which means we can go back home. Logan and Roman will be there too. And I haven’t heard from Mr. Jerkface Ghostington for a while now. Kiddo…_

Patton looked up at Remy. “If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me..?”

Remy dropped his sunglasses slightly to look over the rims at Patton. His eyebrows rose confused.

While Patton tried to figure out a different echo, Virgil lifted his head and whispered, “Sleep…”

Remy frowned at that. He had a name you know. He pushed back up his sunglasses and crossed his arms taking a big slurp of his coffee.

Patton smiled awkwardly and shook his head, “That’s not my name.” Quietly, he started to hum a lullaby.

Oh, that type of sleep. Remy waved his hand and a door appeared next to the base of the staircase. He never crafted an upstairs. It was too much effort that he didn’t need or need to spend. “For… your… sleeping… needs.”

Virgil gave a small tired smile at Patton before slowly shuffling into the new bedroom. As he flopped face first onto the not quite solid bed, he realized he’s spend the entire day really asleep or freaking out. Except for the few minutes when he had been in the kitchen cooking brunch for the both of them, he reminded himself. A genuine smile found its way onto his face. God, that felt so far away. Although he doubted that he would sleep, he was thankful that Patton realized he needed some relaxing space to himself for a bit.

As his eyes involuntarily started to flutter close, something in the back of his mind started to yell at him. Something important, but it was too far away and exhaustion finally overtook him.

//////////////////////////////

Patton had started tapping his fingers lightly in some tune he couldn’t quite remember the name of. There was an awkward silence over the room. Normally Patton loved catching up with Remy, but he wasn’t quite tip-top shape to be in a conversation, definitely not the way he wanted to. Remy rarely hung out with the sides, and they most certainly didn’t visit him. Patton would have to change that. Remy was part of the family.

“Let’s watch, a Disney Channel Movie. It’s Friday, gotta get down on Friday.” Patton broke the silence, a large smile on his face. Make the best of a bad situation, right?

Remy looked up from his phone, the straw he was chewing dropped out of his mouth. Patton could tell he was trying to process what was being said to him. Yet another reason they all should hang out. The sides barely noticed each other’s impediments now. Understanding each other was just second nature now.

“You’re… inviting… me… tomovienight?” Remy finally asked, something Patton the master of emotions couldn’t quite place in the others voice.

Patton nodded as he repeated.

There was a long pause before Remy cleared his throat. “I’llhavetocheckmyschedule.”

Patton’s smile grew. It may not have been a yes, but it also wasn’t a no!

The two ended up back in silence, but this time, it was much more comfortable.

////////////////////////////

After some intermittent and more relaxed conversation between Patton and Remy, Virgil finally emerged from the bedroom. A quick glance by most people, Virgil would look just as stressed and frazzled as he had been before. But Patton was not most people. Patton could see how Virgil’s raised shoulders weren’t as high, how his hand were hidden up his sleeves but he wasn’t picking at the cuff, or when he did a quick sweep of the room his eyes were more alert and moved with a slow smoothness.

“Everything is awesome!” Patton smiled at his dark shadowling. Virgil’s face twitched slightly, a quick smile of acknowledgement.

‘We should go home,’ Virgil signed. His hands had a slight tremble to them that he quickly hid in his hoodie’s pockets.

Patton stood nodding and bending backward to stretch out his back. “Remember Winnie, remember.” Patton tapped his nose and pointed at the lounging sleepy figment.

“Friday, yeahyeahyeah.” Remy waved his hand absently.

Virgil raised an eyebrow and looked between the two, but filed it away to ask about some other time. Patton moved with his arms open toward Remy, but the other tsked and shook his head. He held out a fist. A flash of disappointment crossed across Patton’s face, barely noticeable, but he gently tapped his own fist against Remy’s.

A confused Virgil gave a two-finger salute and sunk out. Patton flashed one more hopeful smile at Remy before following suite.

Remy watched as they left, letting out a sigh. He wasn’t a side and it hadn’t been anything that bothered him greatly for most of his existence. His role in Thomas’ life and abilities were less than the sides, even the Dark ones.

Remy was one of the few solid figments. Most would pop up in their blurry abstract shape and color and fade away. There just wasn’t the same security as being a side… and the Subconscious got lonely sometimes. His manifesting skills weren’t quite the same as the sides, so he didn’t bother going to the Mindscape often. Don’t even get him started on the real world, out there he was barely a ghost.

He shrugged and sipped his coffee watching the familiar waviness of the world around him.

The fact that the consciousness bridge had broken, or at least the others thought that it had, nagged at the back of his mind. The sides didn’t come in here, at least aside from Logan every once in a blue moon, and figments definitely did not possess the ability to do much of anything. With Thomas asleep, he had some free time on his hands.

Perhaps it wouldn’t hurt to just run a quick check of the bridge….after this coffee though.

 

Virgil and Patton both appeared together in the Mindscape’s living room. Patton grabbed his phone and texted a string of emoji’s followed by the fact that the others should be able to get back now. The anxious side rolled his shoulders and flopped into a laying position on the couch. The day needed to be over already.

Although his head was mostly buried in the couch, he heard the familiar whoosh of the others rising up.

“I know you’ve all missed me dearly!” Roman’s boisterous voice shattering the once calming quiet atmosphere.

Virgil groaned into the cushion, while Patton wrapped the fanciful side in a big hug repeating Roman back to himself.

“I am here to.” Logan muttered. Virgil had nearly forgotten that Logan had been stuck with Roman for the entire day. That must have been quite a fun time for him.

‘I just want to sleep for days.’ Virgil mouthed into the couch not caring no one could notice.

“The day was quite adventurous of us all. I think Doom-and-Gloom has a great idea and we should all retire for the night,” Roman motioned to the face-down grumpy and exhausted side.

The sides were plunged into darkness.

 

Thomas stirred in his bed. He let out a large yawn and stretched out, loosening up his body. Virgil sure was a tense guy. Thomas moved into a sitting position and shook out his limbs before shuffling out of his room and down the hall into the bathroom. He splashed some cold water in his face waking himself up more. Looking at the reflection before him, he slowly fixed his bed head. Once he was sure he looked presentable, he gave himself an encouraging thumbs up. As he turned from the mirror to turn off the light, one could catch a small glint of yellow flash in his left eye. “I’ve got thissssss.”


	18. Jesus Take the Wheel

There was an audible swoosh as Roman threw his arms up in the air. “Rewop esool ew did woh? Yticirtcele laer evah neve t'nod ew!”

“Roman you’re backwards again!” Patton shouted happily. Patton must have throws his arms out in excitement because there was an audible smack and Logan quietly muttering a string of scientists. A timid “Sorry Logan” quickly followed.

“Padre oot yako er'uoy dna!” Roman added, the smile on his face evident in his tone.

There was a long pause as Patton tried to decipher what had been said. “Okay!” Patton finally said, giving up.

“Virge, kiddo, you still here?” Patton asked into the darkness. With his accidental physical violence toward Logan, Virgil was the last side that needed to check-in.

As silence filled the room, a knot started to form in Patton’s stomach. Patton was tempted to move closer to the couch in search of the anxious side, but he was sure his clumsiness would just have him falling over everything. He opened his mouth to call out into the room again, but he was cut off by some shuffling on the couch.

_Poor kiddo_. Patton’s face dropped knowing that Virgil’s status was now ‘can’t handle being around people.’ It seemed that his breathing was steady so he wasn’t panicking which was good. It was hard to help him calm down when just trying to help made it worse.

“We should move into the dining room. Roman, you should also conjure some…lanterns,” Logan spoke and even in the pitch black darkness, the others could tell his was adjusting his glasses and stroking his tie.

Roman let out a laugh, “Of course!”

There was a whoosh as Roman’s arm waved, followed by the appearance of some flashlights in hands and flickering lanterns on various tables and shelves. They all blinked, adjusting their eyes while Virgil groaned and tried to burry himself deeper into the couch.

“Sorry there Virge.” Roman whispered as he placed the extra flashlight in his hand onto the coffee table for Virgil to use whenever he felt up to it.

The remaining sides shuffled around the couch to the dining room table, giving Virgil some space while also giving the sides a space to collect themselves and devise their plan. Patton did most of the talking, recounting the day he and Virgil had. Whenever he brought up the ghost, whom he hadn’t heard from in quite some time, he would look over that the huddled form of his dark strange son. Occasionally in the pauses between sentences, he could hear Virgil shifting on the couch but no one was sure if that was him acknowledging their discussion or just trying to get himself more comfortable.

Once Patton had finished the encounter with Remy in the subconscious, Logan was ready to inquire more about the specifics but Roman set off accounting the few events of note.

“Won swonk Noaj.” Roman finished after at least five minutes. The two bespectacled sides stared blankly at Roman. A small snicker was even heard from the other room. Roman’s face dropped slightly and said a silent ‘oh.’

Logan cleared his throat and in a hushed voiced added. “Joan knows about us.” That was the most important event of their time trapped in the real world. “And Virgil had…overpowered Thomas.”

Patton shifted uncomfortably as he gasped and let his hand fly over his mouth. Despite Logan’s best efforts, his voice had moved easily through the otherwise silent Mindscape. The eldest side looked over at the dark blob who was slowly trying to curl tighter into himself. Virgil hadn’t said anything about that. It must have been that bad panic attack he had right before Remy had shown up.

“That could have been what…mended the bridge.” Logan added in an attempt to ‘look on the bright side’, as Patton would say, to relieve some of Virgil’s obviously growing anxiety. There was no need for Virgil to blame himself or feel responsible for what had occurred. There was no previous data to inform the sides that such a thing could happen. He made a mental note to discuss that with Virgil at a later date when things had calmed.

“Well what does that have to do with the ‘power’ going out?” Roman asked. Roman waved his hand absently, more confused than normal.

Virgil suddenly let out a loud shriek. There was a muffled thud as he fell onto the floor followed by a crash of something hitting the back of Logan’s chair. He jumped up on shaking legs. His eyes were wide and although he wasn’t making any noise, the others could tell he was yelling at them. Once he was done, his face rested in a mix of anger and panic.

Logan turned to see what had hit his chair. Broken on the floor behind him were Virgil’s large noise canceling headphones. Well, that wasn’t good. He looked back up to gauge Virgil’s reaction to breaking his probably most prized possession.

Virgil was breathing heavy with everyone staring at him now. “You don’t conjure things onto people’s heads Princey.” He wheezed out in what could’ve been mistaken as a breath.

“Zeej wa.” Roman looked at his traitorous hand. “deneppah taht woh wonk t'nod I.”

Virgil clenched his jaw before curling back up on the couch, now sitting with his knees drawn up watching the black TV screen. At least he was upright, Patton thought to himself as he glanced between his fellow sides.

“…So the black-out?” Patton prompted.

 

Thomas rubbed the left side of his face as he thumped down the stairs. It was unpleasant not to have the familiar ripple of scales there, so smooth and just not right. Thomas’ body had some more weight to it than his normal side form. It was more real...

“You seem in a much better mood,” a voice spoke from the couch.

Thomas flinched and his eyes darted over to their beanie clad friend. No one had told him Joan was here. Who let Joan in? If he didn’t know, then Thomas couldn’t have known right? He must have been expected to reply as Joan raised their eyes from their phone.

Joan seemed to contemplate saying something before shaking their head. “You know you had me worried you dope.”

He let out an uncomfortable chuckle, not quite sure how to respond.

“I brought you home,” Joan made an obvious motion to their surroundings. “Just wanted to make sure you were alright.”

He nodded vaguely remembering the other sides had sent Thomas to hang out with his friends while they handled their problem. “…Thank you.”

“You are better now right?” Joan narrowed their eyes, but he wasn’t exactly sure what the other was looking for.

“Peachy.” He realized he still hadn’t moved since landing at the bottom of the stairs and started to move toward the front door in a manner that didn’t look like he was dragging a heavy body around. “Thank you for the concern. I have a thing to handle, if I could have a bit of time.”

He started motioning to the door. Joan was hesitant but did follow him as he grabbed the door knob. “I will give you an update later.”

Joan exhaled through their nose not quite believing their friend. “You better.”

Closing the door once Joan had disappeared into their car, he turned and cracked his knuckles filling the silent house. “Letssss get down to businesssss.”

 

Patton’s face dropped slightly. “You’re gonna miss me when I’m gone…”

Logan looked up from his notes which had somehow found themselves spread haphazardly across the table. Roman had skillfully made his way back up to his room to attempt to conjure new, indistinguishable headphones for Virgil. The elder side looked up from the paper he had given up trying to read ages ago.

“Thomas sent Joan away. They didn’t talk…” Patton clarified after some awkward silence.

“There has been a lot going on today.” Logan noted lowering his page of notes slightly to show Patton he had his attention.

“He was just so calm…” Patton chanced a glance toward Virgil who had fallen asleep, his head bent backward facing the ceiling. The kiddo was going to have a horrible crook in his neck, but they had learned to leave the anxious side alone when he was sleeping.

“It is possible that Thomas…knows of the past.” Logan offered. Thomas would react calmer knowing that Virgil had possessed him and that Joan had taken him home.

“It just doesn’t feel right, you know?”

Logan adjusted his glasses slightly. “You are much more knowledgeable in that field than I.”

Patton let a small smile creep onto his face. “Don’t count yourself out. I know you’ve got feelings.” He reached across the table and poked Logan in the side of the ribcage. Logan flinched and bit his tongue to keep the laugh from coming out. All the sides were ticklish there.

Logan moved to poke Patton back when there was a knock on the front door. Logan immediately launched to his feet but made no move toward the door.

“Roman!” Logan called up the stairs. The urgency in his voice brought the fanciful side barreling down the stairs. His momentum nearly throwing him into the wall.

Another knock came and the handle began to jiggle as something from the Subconscious tried to get in. An over site on his part, Logan realized the door had no peep hole or way to see what in fact was trying to get in.

Roman’s sword materialized and he stalked toward the now shaking door. With his free right hand, he tentatively unlocked the door and jumped back sword prepared to slash whatever came at them.

Roman was expecting shadow Frankenstein monsters, not a panting Remy holding the limp body of…

“Thomas?” Patton ran toward the figment, pushing the stunned Roman out of the way. “What was he doing in there?”

“Sorry… it’s… not… Friday… I… got… excited, just… couldn’t… wait.” Remy gave a tired goofy smile as Patton pulled the unconscious Thomas into the living room. 


	19. I am You as You are Me and We are All Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate writer's block....

Roman helped Patton situate Thomas on the couch, careful to avoid hitting the sleeping Virgil. Remy had sat down with his back pressed against the front door, Logan was unsure if he was using it just as support or if he was worried something would try to get through the doorway.

Logan dropped Remy’s unusual actions to a second priority and turned his attention to Thomas’ sleeping form. The logical side folded his arm against his chest and rested his chin in his other hand. This was a very perplexing situation.

“Should we wake up Virge?” Roman whispered his eyes darting between the two boys on the couch.

“It may be best to collect more data before doing so.” Logan said not moving his eyes from Thomas. “He will be less overwhelmed and anxious through the comfort of knowledge. That everything is okay, if you will.”

Patton leaned back from where he stood to look back at Remy down the hallway. “Come join the family, kiddo.”

Remy took a bit to get moving, but once he did a large bright smile filled Patton’s face. Before Remy had even landed in the comfy armchair, Logan had started questioning the figment.

“Where did you find him?” Logan motioned to the couch, his attention fully on the other.

“Jeez Lo, give him a second,” Roman whispered seeing the absolute exhaustion on Remy’s face. It was hard enough to trek through the Subconscious dragging a limp body, but now he was in the Mindscape proper and it just wasn’t a place he was used to. The spaces were similar, but there was just enough difference that it was throwing Remy out of whack.

“I went to check on the bridge.” Remy huffed. “This doof was flipping out near it. I had to knock him out and then dragged his dead weight through the entirety of the Subconscious to get the grand tour.

Logan narrowed his eyes in thought. “Where exactly Remy?”

Remy threw his head back into the soft plush of the armchair and closed his eyes. “Outside of a booth?”

Even in the limited light, everyone could see the color drain from Logan’s face.

“Logan…?” Patton quietly moved to place a comforting hand on the other’s shoulder. Surprisingly, Logan didn’t pull away from the contact he just turned to look at the peaceful form of his host. He cleared his throat and blinked a number of times.

“It’s Thomas.” Logan whispered.

“Yeah, we know that Logan.” Patton tilted his head slightly concerned.

“No…” Logan pinched the bridge of his nose trying to figure out how to explain. “You know that Thomas can visit the Mindscape.”

The others in the room nodded slowly, watching the gears turning in Logan’s head.

“But that’s not Thomas…it’s...” Logan let out a frustrated groan as he felt his words leaving him. Patton gave a soft squeeze, his hand still on the logical side’s shoulder. Silence filled the room. Logan had come to some sort of epiphany and the other’s just had to wait until Logan figured out what he needed to say. He was faintly aware that Patton get out a quiet ‘take your time’ whisper into his ear and he fought hard not to let out a harsh laugh. There was no time.

“When Thomas visits the Mindscape, he…he is like us. We are simply only physical representations of our functions. The Thomas that enters this… space, he is only a representation. A projection.” Logan whispered.

“This…..” Logan pointed to Thomas. “This…this…he’s…”

Logan let out a frustrated groan and motioned again to their host. Feeling the tension growing in Logan’s shoulder, Patton gently squeezed it and rubbed his thumb in soothing circles.

“Soul.” Logan hissed out the word.

“If his soul’s out here, who’s controlling his body?” Virgil whispered curling in on himself even tighter. The other’s whipped around, no one had even noticed that Virgil had woken up.

“That’s the million dollar question, isn’t it then?” Patton pondered.

“It would have to be a side…” Logan froze.

Uncomfortable silence fell on the room as everyone finally put together what was going on. “Tieced.” Roman hissed summoning his sword.

“What are the odds he completely ruins Thomas’ life?” Virgil squeaked from the couch.

“It would be rather illogical to ruin Thomas’ life as Deceit is part of Thomas’ life and therefore is affected by what happens to him.” Logan noted in a hopefully more positive tone. He was working on expressing himself more so the others knew that he cared.

Virgil sighed slightly and mumbled something into his knees, but no one pressed him to repeat it.

“So… we… should… getThomasbackintothatbooththen,right?” Remy piped up.

Logan rubbed his temples. “Of course. I highly doubt it will be as simple as opening the door and leaving him there. This…event has never occurred before. We have no…data on this…effect.”

“I am ready to slay any dangers that lay ahead!” Roman exclaimed brandishing his sword, the flickering lantern lights giving it a magical effect. 

“No.” Logan shook his head as Thomas began to stir. “The…traps for Thomas’… space, we do not know if they will… return. Destroying them could leave him… alone.”

“I just don’t know.” Logan added in a whisper to himself as Thomas slowly blinked open his eyes and let out a small groan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little shameless plug for things I was doing instead of writing:   
> I started an Instagram to check track of the shout-out Sundays that Thomas does as well as I think I'm going to try hosting a Thomas Sanders based trivia game show through there.   
> If either interests you, check me out: @ts_shoutlist

**Author's Note:**

> If you like this, or not, let me know. Comments and feedback always welcomed. Have a great day!


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